POppEd uP......

2011-01-07T16:02:00.003+08:00

Day :3
Today was the ugliest, found out so many things and it just shattered my heart and i realise i don't want to be hurt anymore so yeah i'll just stay away because right now she is so repulsive.
As i talked to cp about her, the more i realise i actually rmb all the wrongdoings den the good memories so basically there is really nothing left and there are no space even to be friends.

The last conversation was like a fire which burnt everything to ashes, i give her at most 1 month.... 1 month she will find a new bf or a new fuck partner, even if dun have also got tons of fling by then and change would occur. I dun rmb how lovely we used to be, i only rmb how fucked up she is as a person now. I dun ever wanna be with her again nvr and cp is wrong she will nvr come back, kim would nvr come back bcos i wouldn't take her back too.

Kim can go to hell that piece of slut shit i am so sorry her parents had this kind of shit daughter, she is just a useless piece of shit destined to fail nafa and get fucked hard by tons of guys until one day she finds a unbelievable saint who will marry her. Till then she is so fucked up in my eyes now.........

I jessen siew swear i will not pick up my phone, reply her sms, sms her or check her tumblr for a minimum of 2 weeks starting tml....if not i get straight D's for this semester i swear to god from the bottom of my heart. Unless she is getting raped by some guy and needs my help, enough said.

2011-01-04T11:12:00.003+08:00

U will nvr read my blog here so i can write whatever i want =)
Am i stupid to keep holdig on to you? I keep feeling there may be something else i can do, something more i should do and this relationship would may be change for the better. But it feels like i am walking through a forest of tangling veins, every action i make i think about what you might say because of the promise i made (which is to love you more if you came back to me after i revealed my actual relationship with ruishan to you) The feelings inside me are beyond my vocabulary and the are so confusing and hurtful. I can't keep it inside of me when i see and feel your nonchanlence towards me, and each moment its like your feelings switch between the extreme ends of hot and cold. You don't trust me and sometimes you miss me but when you have stuff to do you don't give shit about me. And i believe when you say you miss me now, its only because the feeling you just had when we are together is still lingering for a few minutes. It is so obvious now that you only miss me when you are absolutely alone and then maybe you might think how nice would it be if i was by your side, simply to put it i am your last choice of company now. And it hurts me because i think about you all the time, feeling so stressed out by the thought of you betraying me once again when you club and how you are now more open to guys and the idea of possible intimacy with them. I get angry all the time, then i get sad, my mood fluctuates as per when you feel.....My mood is solely controlled by you, and i feel so depressed by it. Dating you is so depressing but why am i still here, is it really just because i can't bear to leave yet? Knowing you don't care how i feel just makes it worst, and you have stuff to keep yourself occupied, its like when you don't feel like being together with me you do your very best to forget me. This is not love at all, this is just like a battle to see who wins. I don't feel love rather i feel like i am being punished and its very sick that i feel like i deserved it. But being the suat yee you are now, you wouldnt give a damn......its just an excuse you give to delay time because deep down you just ain't used to me not being there. I guess its time, i shall give us one expiration date till then if things are still like this then we should just break and never see each other again, this is what i tell myself to make me feel better but when i think about it i can't seem to come up with a date. This isn't love anymore rather i feel like we are just friends with benefits and even if by any chance it is love, it is just a one sided love. I am supposed to endure any discomfort i have, or any bad emotions i feel because right now its the cold hard truth that she doesnt care, she doesnt want to care and maybe she is afraid when she starts caring it would be bad. Is it really impossible to change how the relationship works once it has started? I feel headache, heartache all the time its so tiring and painful i really just want to end my life but its not worth it because even if she feels guilt, it would only be at most a day or maybe less den 12 hours. Because this is who suat yee is, she lives life for herself and no one else but herself, its her life and she does whatever she one so as long as no physical or extreme damage is done to anyone else around her.
I don't want to get angry, i don't want to be sad and i don't want to be suffering, so i keep trying to tell myself not to think too much. If she clubs and grinds other guys then its not like i can help it afterall if she can bring herself to do it in the name of fun then it is just her business and i can't do anything about it, if i don't like it i should leave. Mayb be deep down inside her, she thinks like this........its difficult but the only way to not think of it is thru forcing myself not to think of it and doing everything possible to forget it. I really hope one day she would ead all this and just come to understand everyting and maybe just love me back and just do her best to love me. Right now, i am just trying to walk through this forest of needle veins just so i can get to her on the other side. After all this fights, this screaming...i m really tired of always crying in front of her and my friends and of all this drama caused by me. Life can be simple and straightforward but is it really that simple as saying? I don't want to cry anymore and since she deosn't care in the slightest bit how i feel then it's just pointless to really show her, i hope school start sooner so i can drown myself in everything.
I should always put happy thoughts in my brain like the possibility of my skin clearing up once again when i start taking roaccutane and i would have my confidence back.
Working hard and pulling up my CAP
Maybe getting back to trying to learn how to dance again
Earning and saving money so the possibilty of travelling during summer break remains
Learning driving so maybe by year 2 i would have my driving license
Making bash a bang!
Getting more friends and staying more connected with them, hanging out with them more rather then drowning all my sorrows about suat yee all the time. Afterall, people can feel the energy within you...if i am mopping all the time i doubt she would want to be with me and other friends too.
Instead of living life by her, i should live life by myself and just do things that make me happy instead of always letting a part of me slowly self destruct. Its tiring always living in sorrow and desperation all the time.

2010-12-01T00:20:00.002+08:00

Why is she doing all this?? Just 2 days without speaking to her and plus all these constant fights, i feel like she is going to fade away....feeling so flustered and insecure, has the time come??

I was angry bcos of all the stupid stuff she said, i noe der is no fairness in love but isnt she asking for too much? She makes me feel like she can say anything but i cannot flare up no matter wat.......isn't she at fault for saying all those misleading things too?? I jus had the urge to club, after all this trouble i dun even want to tell her anything in the future, feel like no matter what i shuld just keep everything to myself....lest she gives this silent treatment again.

Even after apologizing, she is still giving me the silent treatment....she is so upset this time she is really bend on forgetting me? Maybe she will jus come back and break up with me? I think she wouldnt do that, in fact she is just waiting for me to break up with her, waiting for me to wake the fuck up and walk out of her life like a man....ALL she wants now is unconditional love from me....but i find it so hard bcos i dun even noe wat she feels now. I guess she is really tired and sick of me this time, its really over............

She is so cold and right now i am so far from her i cannot do a thing, its just gonna slowly fade away......

2010-11-23T20:14:00.001+08:00

GO FUCK URSELF KIM GO FUCKING DIE!!!

cb u jus love playing ur cold wars!!!!! fuck break up i noe u dun wanna be the bad guy !! i fucking know it u bitch!!!! u cb slut go fantasize abt ur fav guys!!!!!! go back m'sia u fucking bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-11-22T23:34:00.003+08:00

ASH STYMEST....srsly, u r so infatuated with the guy like u keep posting motherfucking pics of him.......
Feel so sad tt its tuned in ur brain i try to give solutions whenever u say ur probs until when i am trying to jus plainly comfort u, u think i m trying to force my opinion on u......and i dun und y must u be so cold to me?? shouldnt u be happy that i am here trying to protect u, but i sensed that u do not feel any sense of relief its like u can do without me and so many insecurities yet u are forcing me not to ask u every single time......its either u give me a unclear ans or u say i am thinking too much and say a few sweet things and let it be.........yeah things are diff and u care less abt our r/s.....and its kinda clear tt slowly u r jus nt used to living life w/o me ur so called love is jus reliance u dun wanna rock tt balance........

In actual fact u dun love me anymore.......

u used to not look at guys or like search for pics online....and it doesnt help tt my looks are jus getting worse, its as if i am nt good enuff for u anymore and the more u r exposed to ur social circle the more you wanna b free frm me.....and i guess i am angry all the time bcos its so true and its coming and i can do nth to stop it, very soon u will realise that u dun need me and freedom is wat u rlly want at this stage of ur life. Eventually this flickering flame would jus die out in a blink of an eye w/o both of us knowing.......its painful and depressing that i no longer feel like u love me, the things i say dun make u laugh, the stuff i do u dun find them cute anymore, the jokes i say they are just normal and the time spend with me its just bcos...........u r used to

and i dun wanna b something u are used to, there is no love no love at all frm u......nth but an illusion made from the desire to go back to the past....and everything aint like in the past, now wateva i do i can't impress u! i aint ur cool tattoo-ed studded guy with long hair and good complexion and charming eyes who smokes and does cool things like dj-ing or wateva u fucking nafa-ians think is cool......its alwas hw cool is he? omg she is so cool with her lifestyle choices, she is so rich she is so cool with her kinda frens and the stuff she does.....but even though i am called ur bf in name, i am just the boy by ur side and nothing more, i feel like eevrything else is somewhat fake and difficult to grasp......u would nvr tell me hw cool the things i do mayb my life aint fucking artistic and exciting enuff for u! u have chged or isit truly who u are the superficial gal i see now so desperate for an exciting social circle and all the 'fun' stuff young druggies do while wasting their lives away.............n u dare call me superficial when all along the things u described me with ur jus worst then it!All i ever hear from u is the realisation of how mismatch we are, those words sting and they would nvr disappear, why why.....why.......

u say u can't tell me things, and ur repeated reminders made me think how silly i was to show you wat was underneath me, my emotions. They disgust u dun they? I understand how u dun feel like opening up to me, bcos i dun feel like telling anything AT ALL i dun wanna be beaten down by u ever again with ur perception of a 'real' man...........ur rite i cant be the man who endures ur every shit.....its impossible , sometimes u may not realise it but these things they hurt deeper then they seem to be.

right now as i am writing these i realised how silly i was to assumed u care, and all i can think of is leaving, wat a tragedy.......and i blame myself for foolishly thinking a boy like me would suit a gal like u and we would grow to und each other, the truth is we would never grow if we stick tgt. And tts y when u start growing, u see things abt me u didnt used to and it breaks my heart entirely to watch u start to be disgusted by my actions, and struggle more and more freedom and start to hate and despise everything i do tt doesnt suit ur expectations. And so now with all the power in ur hand, i hope u crush me to death so i do not need to rise again from the glimmer of hope tt alwas sips thru because tt glimmer is jus my imagination.............all i can think of now is how u look down on me tt i am not man enuff for u when i say all the things tt i feel inside so fuck u, fuck u truly if for this second if u think tt way.......

i hope u see all these, i really do cos deep down i hope u cared and feel a sting when u noe hw i feel but then again when u noe all this would u rlly feel the sting or do u jus feel sympathy for a guy u do not think is manly enuff for u .......if so quietly let me go bcos i dun wanna be ur pillar plainly for support or wateva use tt u may think of.....fuck off

2010-11-11T22:34:00.002+08:00

i noe u will see this and i hope u do, and i really hate it...........feel like u taking me for granted

All i want is support and concern from u when i am in a down and stressed period, guess its just not in us this kinda couple.........u would go away for a few hours and dunno do wat with ur frens and reply me those nonchalant msg

tt is y i am alwas angry when u r with ur frens, u would give me all the attention in the world when u r not with them and when u r with them, i would have to fight for ur attention and u would think i am being wilful......cant bliv i was angry and u noe it but u were eager to go back to the game....

i cant stand your fucking attitude, its like i feel as though u can do w/o me....go to hell

2010-11-02T17:33:00.003+08:00

it has been so long, and if i didnt not feel like dying i wouldnt come here.....

I am so lost and confused, i am rlly depressed till a stage every small thing just goes in a downward spiral.......no money, no looks, no friends, no results and no happiness...did i rlly brought all these upon myself? Am i rlly too greedy? I just wanted a fucking acne free face but its nvr ever gonna happen tot roaccutane helped but it came back and as bad as it used to be, the med alr made my skin looked old if i m gonna take it another time wat will i become????

Dunno wat i want in life....the truth is my life is over, if i had knew i would be enjoying my studies and start afresh instead of like jus passing everday like it is and having a gf which doesnt rlly gives me true happiness, or i cant find happiness within myself, our r/s is jus fucked up so fucked up............der is no sweetness ever and all i can do is jus slip into darkness

2009-04-11T15:43:00.002+08:00

I AM BACK!!to my blogging and also from overseas training!!! pray BCU for the 23rd let's go!!!The training was neurotic and emotional, i felt like a family for split seconds when evryone cheered at the end of frame dinner.....sadly we did not go to the 'promised' land but nevertheless photos taken just check out my facebook acc yeah?

I learn lotsa things from the trip, but its really complicated anyways. One of the most important thing i learnt was the people who will always be there for me=) FAMILY.....the utmost impotant thing in my life, though not usually what a army dude would say. There are really times when u would fall and wished u could just lie there. These are the times u think about those important to u and u stand strong just so u know how proud of u the are at home. haha enough for the emo talk, came back with a shit allergy reaction, can't party can't do shit actually. Was really glad it happened at home anyways, so i have ppl to take care of me=) yawnsssss tired and bored=_=

i'm seriously a freaking random dude

2008-12-21T21:27:00.007+08:00

Last week was busy busy!!!!lucky the outfield was not so tiring=_= but Glen was gone so i had to do work=( people calling my name like evry 20 mins, its totally screwed up Wellcan't wait for xmas, need time togo shopping but i dun want to go alone...well the bridge is straight at the end of the road=)But after a hedious week, FRIDAY came!!weeeee so we rushed home and chiong to clark quay to visit the new club rebel.

To our super duper surprise, there was no one inside!!ARHHHHH tt was what we tot at 1st but later the crowd just keeps coming in, phew. And the music was so good , YES!better than phuture like thousand times?

CLiff's da boss, love him!!haha

went to MAC for hotcakes, by then all of them high le look at the wasted fella on the left hahaha

2008-11-02T04:13:00.002+08:00

SO many things to say but somehow the things i say just doesnt make sense at all.....
1st, this blog gonna die le cos life's jus to boring to tell anyone about it=_=its just my public journal now(contradiction to the max)
9 days break pass in a blink of an eye, well its undeniably painful but life sucks and we have to suck it up=)too bad...9 days jus go out only and slack at home it was good...haha but kinda scary cos felt like i would grow fat again after ORD.....MUST WORK OUT!!!!

Very emo now, cos tml booking in le and i realise humans are stupid beings cos they give themselve hope so that it can be destroyed....人就是那么犯贱！！哈哈and i happen to be one too
these few days there are some events which made me realise alot of things, sad things and also life goes on even though when things seem to be alwas going the wrong direction...OH OH and also happiness can be found in the smallest and most insignificant activity that u may not realise and its happening around u.....a call from someone, a little bit more concern from ur parents and not superficial things but emotionally cos we need these little bit of emotional happiness to move on in life, hmm i can't really express what i want to say but if someone can understand then thank u!!!

Some things came unexpected and it was sad....i hope he has gone to a place where he can find solace. I understand his pain just like it was my own, the feeling of being cornered to a extent you cannot breath...it was unexplainable but i felt his pain and tears jus came so suddenly but he was less fortunate he din had the support i had and it forced him to make a selfish decision....

After all that i said, i am still not perfect just a flawed human with discrimination towards things that are just not of my liking=_= cos we all are, we realise things but somehow we dun have the strength to change things in our heart...hmmmm i feel like i am talking jibberish..AHHHHH

haiz, the only happy thing was, the angelic glance we received..haha chester should noe...PLEASE IT WAS ME!!!!!haha and jp billy bombers got pretty waiters!!!:Pshe only works on weekends i think?i din stalk her its just tt jp is lk 5 mins away from home and i need to buy food for myself right????AND i need a gf, just like the 'angel' we saw today(her bf is one lucky shit if she has one unless she is just one big toot) but well mayb she was looking cos of our disgusting short hair and was thinking in her mind what stupid ass we look like....but i prefer to look on the BRIGHT side=)Luckily my hair is growing, I DIE ALSO DUN WANNA CUT BEFORE red beret presentation...on the way home today i felt like i was the ATWC(attract the wrong crowd) gang and i just not what jie and others always say i am.....please dun ask me wat i meant in this sentence cos i wun entertain u=_=i am just not suited for there, f***k my luck man, its the worst especially when it comes to..........................................all i want now is to get beret, get an 'angel' gf hahah and save more money and pass driving=)))))

tired,sleep for now so tml will be a new day for me to suck life up.....it feels great to be alive yet annoying to face life's daily dosage of reality........even world's richest man's life isn't perfect!!!

2008-10-12T18:50:00.002+08:00

normal mundane life...yawn~~~
house bunny was really funny=D guys would appreciate it more..hahaha
yayz got bonus for gold, woo the best part is the earlier book out part love it totally
but when i get out life is jus plain boring la.....
back to camp=(

2008-10-02T15:03:00.002+08:00

HELLO!!!i am back=)brunei was a s**thole, and i hope i never need to be back der again.Training process was tough, did things i never thought i would do and i surely don't want to do again...well they said it was confidential so cannot say much....well i SURVIVED and proud to say din fall out once, even though i tot of falling out lk thousand times.
Sun was nice had a nice bdae cake, super oreo cheese cake from a very high class cake shop in taka....

it was delicious!!!

bdae boy!!

family...

mum=)

sibs..haha

then mon went on a shopping spree!!!!haha nt tt zi lian to take pics of myself in dressing room so no pics...went to buffet aft tt my stomach nearly burst
see for urself....

this was jus round 1, we had 3 rounds, i think?

ALL HAIL THE SASHIMI EATING KING
this dude loves sashimi ALOt!!!
well it was a fruitful day , shopped alot but was fucking sad when i look into my walllet at the end of the day=_=1st time i bought zara clothes, its a nice place for me cos the clothes suit me alot=)new shopping store
*DRUM ROLL*then came WEDNESDAY, and wed= MAMBO/ladies night!!tt was how i felt before i went, adrenaline and excitement....but things changed when i went it was pure boredom, like wtf?!it was bad~
anyw despite i still had a little tiny bit of fun

what guys do with citibank credit cards, but i din drink it was the other grp of guys that went with us...they can drink man i tell u
Last but not least, end the entry with a picture=)and have to go back to camp today, back to a routine life=_=

my dudes.... COMMANDOS
-need to save
-need my hair
-need to have my driver's license
-need to start a portfolio for uni
-need get out of army
-need to be happy
1 more mth to beret, i have finally come so close....

2008-08-30T03:20:00.003+08:00

MOS IS THE WORST EVER,and i am never gonna go back der again.....bad music, bad crowd and bad atmosphere and i emphasize the music is fucking lousy!!!!!!!!!!!worst clubbing experience it was like a total nightmare=_=so shagged from the boredom that i came home earlier lik 2 hours....................
well wateva today shopping experience was ok la but i enjoyed the company of my 2 buds...=)

this weekend was abit fucked up=( 2nd last week b4 i go brunei...i am scared really scared.
I tink abt it and i don't know whether i have the strength to face the path that awaits me.....i don't want to break down cos its too late for me. I can't back down now le, if i do all my blood and sweat would be wasted......
where can i seek solace in? i wonder...........

2008-08-23T05:31:00.002+08:00

EX ALL OUT is over finally, and after that is the brunei trip...=_= and 'the man' says ex all out is lk the tip of the iceberg compared to BRUNEI. Well it 'helps' alot hearing this, thanks.
well whatever, chiong out of camp ytday night to go clubbing!!!BUT zouk gt a event and no one got in, so after a a few detours we made our way to MOS unwillingly....it was ok mayb cos all the ppl tt was supposed to go zouk came MOS in the end...it was worth the trip anyway, hehe=)i had loads of fun.

Never thought i would love clubbing, used to be the 'boy at home'. NS changed me...alot.
It gave me strength , confidence and 1 time good time endless sufferings.Dunno how to described it, well it gives a very very very good 'kick' after u have passed through evrything=)Aft 1 round of cock, i am jus saying it chged me to someone i dunno whether its good or bad....
well at field camp last week, chester made me think of someone ...sometimes she jus appears but i dunno wat i feel sia....i jus feel lk toking to her, mayb bcos she sees hw much i have chged tts y she also afraid of me le. The army dudes oso said i chged alot, but i noe somehow i am still me la, just tt i din have the chance to bring my inner self out last time.

well, reward is damn sweet, but only its a result of hard work

2008-07-27T16:24:00.002+08:00

This weekend seemed exceptionally longer, a good thing, just maybe cos i have accepted the fact of long weekends being confiscated.Woke up in the morning lk i had a hangover, mus be cos i specially woke up on sat ealier to not waste my precious weekends....
Did nothing much today, went jp walked around decided to buy yoga lin's album, its a not bad one....sad, cos i will be back to camp tonit again=_=
emoing at home while packing my stuff=( emo abt when uni comes?when i finally pass out?wheni finally get my gf?haha But even though i alwas see hw much trouble my frens go through for their gfs, i still want one>.Its a sad thing tt weekends is the only thing i look forward...grr the only good thing abt army is that when u come out on weekends u can go wild,and no one would blame you cos its a tough life inside.....man i am totally nonsensical....wtf?!

2008-07-26T14:56:00.002+08:00

WOO!!my vry 1st long weekend.....super rush~~went clubbing immediately i hit home...haha it was a hell of a night!It was fun having mh, n dan around and cliff was a super funny dude in the club...haha couldnt stop laughing la..the music ytday night sucked abit and the load of guys .....but the later part was worth the wait The night was a pleasurable experience...lol dun tink dirty but its for me to know=)It was super la...the clubbing experience ,the long weekends, aww can we have more of them?

Just went field camp last week 3 days w/o bath and chging clothes, i tink gals would faint if they stand near us, haha but it was nt as diffcult as the 8 days in tekong...while there are tougher ones ahead=_=still standing strong
army changed me, in both good and ~~bad ways~~...contradiction

2008-07-06T03:46:00.002+08:00

Singapore men ( NS or uni) are horny while the gals are conservative=_=....lol i am jus being an ass, but tt sum up the clubbing experience for me tonight...it was incomparable to the other time, for single guys lk me gg der is lk treasure hunt and even if u found the treasure its guarded by a indestructible wall of 'men'...so it's fucked up!!!Dan got high smoking LOL then drink one graveyard and knocked out so we went home early if not i think he slping at ZOUK until now...and other one came late then follow his fren it was sian la~~~but the good thing was dan's fren opened bottle so it was free liquor for us...make me dizzy for awhile!!
as clarence said it,'i lead a bitter life' book out delayed lk fuck, then clubbing was not exceptional...haha i can't wait till ORD so i can leave the place which robs human freedom of singaporean men...

2008-06-30T22:54:00.002+08:00

AWW man....finally i am now a battalion boy!AND I DUN FEEL ANY JOY AT ALL...All the training tt is abt to come, brunei and stupid treatment and WORST no nights off and friday book out anymore!!!!!!!!!!(tt is lk the ultimate nightmare)
To add on to my misery, they din arrange proper bunks for us, its lk a 2 man bunk but have to sqeeuze 8 man~~~fucking shit!!The room condition is fucked up to the max!
I rlly can't expect much of the life ahead...man, i can't wait for uni!!!500 something more days to ord...gawd it seems lightyears
SERIOUSLY i enjoyed certain parts of life inside camp, but when you are not an officer ,life will never be goodT.T
Its plain depressing thinking of gg back after my leave which ends TOMORROW!!haiz, i miss school life, school life!!!!!!!

2008-06-21T00:37:00.002+08:00

prettiful!!!!!!!!!!!=)

just watched get smart with siblings and cute neighbour!!haha funny show with loads of family frenly jokes=) but the best part was playing with neighbour and he tore his pants right when we were supposed to leave west mall....totally pawnage!!!!!!!!SO WAS ANNE HATHAWAY!!!she is a uber charming woman, totally smitten with her~~~~~~loves the holidays and evrything....if only i had more money it would be a BLAST!!!

2008-06-19T20:46:00.002+08:00

YAY!!!!!!!!BLOCK LEAVE!!!luves...but too bad no cash to go overseas, but nvermind clubbing was hyper!!!Music was high, liquor was good and BEST gals were hot=)Kenneth, dom and gang were good ppl, thx!!!pics still with dom, but the most hilarious part was the 'uncles and geeks' dancing at zouk stage!!!it was 'omg' funny!!!!WANT TO GO AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!

Haiz, i wan to watch zohan sia and the hulk anyone up for it????block leave is pure heaven.....dunrlly want to go back battalion for hell=(

2008-06-01T01:20:00.002+08:00

the fun times with buddies=) last week went out with chest n mh, had a nice time jus chilling out with them...it was nice until..haha mh n chest knows it=) then the curse of the 3 man group came where we would alwas b stuck with 3 man when the night sets in....but there were interesting things lk the cat which had a ERECTED tail in a weird way...

focus focus on the tail!!!haha

The ALL stars league, hee all had the same brand of shoe=)
then when the curse struck us,this is wat bcame of us....

TOTALLY BORED GUYS AT CINE!!!!!wahahaha

my pretty T shirt=)lurvesssss

BUt today had tons of fun in the sec sch clicks gathering=) It's alwas a fun tiem with them la never fail to make me laugh....the best=)we went mind cafe a place near paradiz centre where ppl play board games and jus chill....nice chill place=)the board game playing gt really high ...haha hilarious actions and stupid jokes, made my day totally=)

And b4 i knew it, it was dinnertime at NYDC(food was ok,swenson and fish&co is better), pics still with dawn then we walked around suntec...haha look at this

this joker yq din even realise he gt fairy fillers on his head until i took the foto and showed it to him...haha dawn put it on..Amazing~~~

Suntec has a special fountain, was so amazed i took a picture of it, but doesnt show why i am amzed with it...

the lighting made the water seems lk its flowing up and the water made the little lights look like their floating?haha

then off we go to hooters at clark quay for a little tequila(3 jugs), chat chill hang love the finger guessing fun=) and we ended the day with fotos=)time past so fast with them...haha

nice day~~~~

2008-05-31T00:38:00.002+08:00

You never really appreciate until you experience something worst off....
You never really see the pain unless you are one of them
You never really feel the sting unless you are the one hearing it
'hurt' moments of life=_=

sianess sometimes if camp have easier time staying in it would feel better cos i have excuse from the realities of life=_= appeals , pray they pass through!

not a good time to ask 'how have you been doing', if you get wat i'am saying

2008-05-11T01:21:00.005+08:00

BACKPAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!wahahahahha, yes it finally came, more than i expected. Super happy, now i can buy my stuff and pay my bills and save too......heeheee

SO, ate a sumptous favourite MOS burger meal and my ultimate fav ice cream...then i embarked on a journey to search for my jean...so aft walking here and der finally bought a pair at SPIN THE BOTTLE, love it and then walk walk again then saw this store at PS which sells cool graphic tees jus beside LEVI's. Bought 2..super

And the highlight was catching HAROLD AND KUMAR!!!finally watch it after desperate measures ,me cs and chest found a cinema at shaw towers, hilarious!!!love it, payday is alwas a lovely day=)

eh, but today its MUM's day,so hope all mums in the world rock on.....

Guess it's fated clubbing with army dudes is not possible, haha...(read btwn the lines?)

no hard feelings=)

NXT week totally fucked up gt range, weekend burnt...shit!

life miserable,

no gf,

no uni letter,

no wild frens free to club(haha),

problems,problems,problems

life...

2008-05-01T03:41:00.002+08:00

Nth much today but was rlly glad we get to booked out earlier than expected...BY ALOT!!haha slacked at home did PT and went for midnit show with kor....IRON MAN!

and mymy the tix are $10 lk wtf?!most exp movie i ever watch. But it was good,4 stars mayb?But the graphics were awesome=) so overall i am ok with $10 movie ticket

At the cinema, saw a gal with 4 guy frens all just normal frens for a late late nite movie..hmm not dangerous meh? the guys may get ho**y and all, i mean the gal was cute haha...hmmmmmm

2008-04-20T10:54:00.002+08:00

*Pissed mode on* grr......wasted weekends

2008-04-18T21:16:00.002+08:00

YES!!!!!i completed the BAC le, hehe i am a paratrooper=) But the last 2 combat jump was super eventful.....
1st, the combat equipment is fucking heavy, i nearly vomit blood when we were boarding the plane with the parachute tgt with the combat equip. Imagine u cannot even stand straight and u have to support 10 kg of load , grrr=(

2nd the 1st jump had a super bad exit and ended with a fucking bad twist in my parachute lines, would have landed in the hospital if i was nt lucky la....SERIOUS!! It was lk super scary la, my mind totally blanked out la din even realised i had a reserve by my side....but thx to warrant yugi guiding me on the ground. When he told me brace for impact, i looked at the ground and saw the drain la, i was lk OMG?!luckily float pass the drain but i was descending too fast and i sort of knew the landing wasnt going to be a nice one.....but haha i think god blessed me tt day i landed unexpectedly well.....
Apparently, my twist was lk super serious many frens on the ground noticed it la i was rlly lucky they said....

but the 2nd jump of the day ended damn well...=) BUT the worst was the recovery back to the RV, 1km with lk 30kg on ur shoulders and twice!!cos i did 2 combat jumps, tt was the most fucked up part of combat parachuting

finally!!!!sliver wings upon my chest!!!
shall post the picture when i come back on sun =)

'friends' it has a complex definition

2008-04-11T22:37:00.002+08:00

whahaha i have my wings!!! Train for so long.............finally did the 3 parachute jumps hehe was super exciting and i am super happy to say i landed w/o any injuries*beaming with joy* Its lk the most exciting thing i have ever done in my life!!!!The nervousness u feel on the plane, the thrill u get jumping out and the happiness of landing safely!haha make me want to sign on>.< BUT i dun think i would seriously consider it as a career path la!!

BAC totally rox!more freedom more action, and tons of nights out but with one fucking hot bunk full of fucked up mosquitos!i wish to exterminate them all

doesnt seem to be better=(
off to enjoy the warmth of my bed, and the coolness of my fav aircon=)

2008-03-29T01:35:00.002+08:00

WOO!i suddnly feel all the bad things are gg away slowly....the WO chg my vocation!haha i was happy to hear it but somehw i felt abit sad abt it cos i gt in bcos 1 demo guy gt a fractured arm so he had to rest and i took his place...but it felt lk i snatched it away=(

chg to new camp started BAC lk 3 days ago, parachute is supa heavy and my muscles are aching lk they have nvr ache b4, but overall evrything is damn interesting as for now except the stupid helmet which makes my head painful!!!and i mean literally painful

The best part was when i came home the FLAT samsung TV was here, and the tv is to be put in MY ROOM!!!woooo supa!!!cos sis gt it frm starhub offer, sis is great=)now i can relax in my room more!!!

walking across a rocking bridge, but i will get through.....

2008-03-22T17:18:00.002+08:00

i POPed lk last week haven had the energy to put up the fotos, so i decided to put them up today=) and the small fotos when i went sentosa with the guys during the block holidays!!enjoy the slide=)

well basically din do much since POP, but somehow feels lk i am hitting a rough patch recently...Things dun go the right way man, results are nt ideal and got a vocation which i least wanted.Felt like fuck when i was told abt my vocation and couldnt find anyone to chg and worst of all i ended up with the people i cannot stand=(Wat's worst evryone was seperated to diff bunks(miss bunk 8 and chest alot man), its lk the ultimate nightmare la!!!But to adapt is the way of life i guess?But rlly feel damn aimless, cos there's nth to work for anymore but somehow i got to know a new instructor who has been quite nice to me....Somehow he tries to talk to me and find out hw things has been gg. I told him straight i want to be in demo, oh boy hope he can rlly help me switch!!!BUT i know its quite impossible , so no high hopes b4 i die the 2nd time....=( Hw i wish i have a gf, mayb i shuld get one haha....

I feel sick and tired recently and i rlly mean SICK !cold and cough, great jus wat i need for my airborne course....And it has become so diff to make something happen...dun wish to talk abt it but all i have to say is sometimes it's better to give a direct answer rather than ignorance and 'mayb's...it feels fucked up!!!but evryone has their problem, life is difficult>.<

~~ALL torn up~~.....

2008-03-13T21:40:00.002+08:00

Finally POP le!!!but i gt the vocation i hate most SIGNALS!!lk wtf but tt day when ma put on the jungle hat on me i was so touched...i finally made it through BMT it meant something to me la cos of the hardships ma...BUt all the good people i met are gg to different vocations, so sad la but as RAJ said WE CAN MIT DURING WEEKENDS!!!! 'celebrated' our POP with glen n mh poor us!!!they shuld noe wat i mean haha den we took stupid fotos oso shall post them up when glen send me=)

met yl at night today to get uni brochures frm her, said i chg alot and i look better in cap haha thx!but i felt bad, sry hor made u come all the way then dao u=( forgive me ya?

2008-03-07T16:41:00.002+08:00

Finally gt A's it was disapointing la, its nt lk fucked up la its fairly decent but i dun want to say la....i tot my chem would get A lo but it turn out lk this but the only happy thing was my econs actually din fail ...so ya lo! i rlly wanted to tell mh i oso gt the same grades as him la, i envy him....

After i came home din rlly wish to talk abt it la, i noe my family dun feel proud oso...mixed emotions , then as i sat down the sad feeling jus came la haiz....the rest of the guys i dunno wat to say to them la cos i dun feel good also...somehow ppl telling me it's ok din rlly sound nice la, it makes the person hearing it feel worse lo...so whenever u c someone nt happy abt their grades , pls dun console....

tired so tired , jus hope to slp it away

2008-03-02T17:28:00.002+08:00

I AM OFFICIALLY BANKRUPT!! haha it turns out saf gave me 2 mths of pay in advance and poof! i spend in accidently=( so for now its staying at home using com and chilling its not tt bad la ...its jus plain BORING!!! my god wanted to ask ppl out but on second thought i am penniless lk wtf! i want to shop la!!!dun wan wear baggy clothes>.<
Lusky i dun have a gf if nt i would be lk feeding on pure air, LOL!!But its this kind of boring times hope der was someone pei me go out walk walk and i mean a gf...hahaAnyone gt recommendation to places with nice graphic tees and jeans? few more hours to book out few more days to P.O.P!!hehe i can't wait to use back my gatsby wax!!!But BMT was gd, got to know funny dudes and ppl who do nt leave me behind, made me grow up and appreciate things around me. Even though most of the times i dun show hw i feel but i hope they noe i rlly miss them whenever i am inside camp=)
hmm signing off bored to tearsT.T

2008-02-29T23:57:00.002+08:00

yes!!today gt to book out early and it was lk the earliest we have ever booked out haha...
but went home jus wanted to rest do nth, it felt rlly nice=) 2 weeks more to P.O.P ,time flies another few more weeks i can see my hair again!!!LOL
i tink i was fat when i went in la bcos i lost 9 kg in lk 5 weeks?haha it feels damn gd!BUT all my clothes getting bigger la, lk wtf to a extent someone with initials M and H in their name said i was too hipster...made me sad lo=(
hah but i din control my spending so now i am officially broke and no money to revamp=( i mus rlly save and control i got a shock when i update my bank book(nearly cried)haha
hmmmm, and there is rlly nth to talk abt camp same old boring stuff unless lk one of the instructors is lk a super hot gal mayb tt would make a good topic?haha
signing off=)

2008-02-24T12:39:00.002+08:00

woo!!!i finally survived field camp.....it was a path of growth mentally and physically. Went through alot of things to finally relax for the 2 miserable days but better then nth!

came back on fri had lunch with raj and mh had a nice time talking, then at night went out again with them went xin wang cafe eat lk GOOD food...haha when u have eaten combat ration u wouldnt complain abt food, trust me>.< Missed so darn lot of things at camp so these 2 days pampered myself with good food and met up with lim and tien!

they were vry shuang kuai in agreeingso it was rlly nice talking to them abt our diff experience....i missed the days we alwas used to kp each other in sch..haha

went gym this morn had a good workout but so sad its sun alrdy i slept through the aftnn ytday it was kinda sad la...hmm all in all tt was hw i spent my weekend la haha

2008-02-01T22:39:00.000+08:00

YAY!!!spreads arms in the air!!today booked out earlier...woohoo desperation for freedom is relieved la...it's fun inside camp sometimes with my kinky bunkmates!!but its oni sometimes!!!pls fellow dudes who is waiting for enlistment train urself lk super fit and u will surely HAVE a easier life inside trust me,it would be fun if u are super fit by fit i mean lk u can do pull ups lk dunno wat and run lk the wind....well i am not la..haha
CNYCNY come quickly i can't wait to wear new year clothes go out with mates with family to collect ang bao!!!!

2008-01-10T18:59:00.000+08:00

OMG!!!!!Tml i am gg to camp at 8 am le, i am lk sibei scared...haha haiz aft jc another super phsically and mentally tough journey awaits, sian la!!!!the clock is lk tick tick approximately 14hours later i'll be at pasir ris doing push ups LOL! Omg give me strength arh !!!

2008-01-07T19:09:00.000+08:00

Ytday was super fun cos went to hang out with 4e2 classmates and Dawn...Even though it was a simple bowling trip n kobox it was super nice cos they kept joking around and we could almost talk abt anything including THINGS guys dun usually tok abt around gals!!!

Kbox was sibei funny cos wq and choon ngee was competing to see whose voice was louder, haha and choon ngee lost and lost his voice too...then they started mimicking the dance in the jolin and cyndi's MV. It was lk wtf funny...then we had dinner at xin wang the food was ok la ....

I am glad they still rmb to call me out during gatherings, haha it's alwas nice to hang out with them la cos they are super funny!Sometimes u gotta admit 4 years its alwas the best....

But back to reality today, grrr i think my family can be the author for "spoil someone's day for dummies"....i rlly scared abt missing them in camp lo but recently whenever i'm with them i alwas have a lousy mood! And thx to them again i totally lost my mood to buy my new year clothes....thx to sis who keeps talking as if i were to die in camp so dun need buy new year clothes, machiam she nvr buy for herslf lk tt...the tension is so fucking high whenever they call me do something i feel lk exploding...grrrr

Fri goin in camp, thinking abt it i feel so lousy....thx to evrything=_=

2007-12-31T00:05:00.000+08:00

Hee today went out to west coast park with bro n sis tomeet up with rachael's family! It was a super HoT sunday, but it was a day of fun!But i had so much fun i forgot to take photos le=( But as usual racheal's cuteness made my day,it was nice to have her sticking to me...she was so cute tt when i went to the toilet, she waited for me outside the toilet.

Then when we went fo lunch she curl up on my lap haha, dun want to come down so i had to eat with her sitting on my lap,=)so cute rit? Understand lk 0.05% of wat's is lk to be a parent, pre 'dad' training for me,haha.But when they gg home le she knows its nt lk she will follow me home haha!

Keep having weird dreams these few days=_= feeling abit naseous thinking abt enlistment....abit excited and abit worried!well the enlistment date is coming faster and faster lo!!! Good luck to all enlistees of JAN may u all make out alive and macho shit!!woo..haha

We find solace in innocence and love, and we discover reality through pain
(jus something i thought of while bo liao-ing)

2007-12-29T23:39:00.000+08:00

HEY!!! Advance Happy New Year to evryone!!! well the new year is coming so must give ending speech for 2007!

1st, it was nice to have made frens lk tien n ah chong and the 12k guys who came our class=) Also the teachers lk mdm chan n paul, having them as teachers this year was a blessing. Well somethings are things tt words can't rlly describe lk the things i learn, the things i felt abt things haha! Lastly hope next year will b a BETTER year=)

New year resolutions!

1.Pass A's

2.Pass army

3.Get dream gal(nt who u think it is guys)

4.Save

5.Lead a more less slacker life

6.Live life!

well pics of me at sis bbq and the PRINCESS racheal hah!

Smilez!

Vry cute RIT?!

Racheal with the violin me and my siblings gave her for X'mas(its a a rlly nice toy..haha)

me with racheal de didi Keiren!hehe his expression abit unwilling=(

tadaa!

And we ended off with her million dollar smile!

And tml gg to west coast park to play with racheal haha!tml will b a nice day!!

2007-12-24T23:13:00.000+08:00

Merry X'mas everyone!!! Long time since my last update..well life is mundane! but there are interesting days like the gathering last sat with sis fren and my favourite RACHEAL!!!haha she was so adorable she stuck to my the whole night..hehe shall post fotos when i have hands on the camera.

And ytday was fun too!Went out with zookeeper and caught the movie Mr magorium's it was a pretty weird movie which was abit boring. Thx for the little key chain=)

Today was...sadly boring haha so loser rit bored on x'mas eve=( but surprisingly meet ex classmates when at jp they were gg to their gathering haha kinda lighten up my mood when i saw them and i have no idea why?! Well tts for the recent events la

2007-12-19T00:52:00.000+08:00

When someone is sad, nver say 'dun b sad'....cos sometimes we cannot understand the things they are gg through and nvr assume u understd bcos u are close to them....so the nxt time u see a sad person jus sit by their side quietly whn needed...

haha a sense of nostalgia rushing through me as i flip through the pages of the old photo albums...came a long way but i seem to hate wer i am now....
people chg nt by choice but by circumstances
nt matter hw close u are to a person, he may jus walk away one day
so instead of hoping time to stay still, enjoy now ba

i was bored at home wat, it is 12 wat u xpect so i went to flip my foto albums ...haha lame me la

2007-12-11T15:30:00.000+08:00

Damn the season to be jolly...
f lala ~ la ~ la~la ~la~ la~
Where's the joy in this big season
f lala~la~la~la~la~la~la~

.....wth apparently the joy of this X'mas season is nt getting to me,and unlike wat the horoscope says evrybody around me is nt bringing joy=_=X'mas basically doesnt mean a shit....grrr

2007-12-10T21:01:00.000+08:00

I have laze to a extent my brain have disintegrated....=_= Right now waiting for enlistment date, try to pull myself out of bed evryday to run..Life is basically lk one piece of blank paper nowT.T other then taking care of bro gg out games there's pratically nthing to do.

okok its me who don't want to do anything, it's abit stupid to find a job right now bcos i have less than a mth to enlistment. Hw i wish i was abroad now, haiz the grass is alwas greener on the other side. When in sch, pray for holidays when in holidays pray for activities!!!! but recent outings were fun la the steamboats and dota, it was nice=)

And racheal came to visit!!!Haha she took a long time to warm up but she is soooo cute la...love it when she comes=)

Tadaaa adorable rit? haha

So i was bored and i started to draw....

and draw

and draw...and i noe my drawing is mediocre...

srry i still haven tot of wat to draw for uT.T forgive me ya?

2007-12-02T23:35:00.001+08:00

It's raining so heavily,
that i can't see the path for us to take.....
but we will walk slowly step by step,
to see a rainbow beyond the rain....

it was so painful, i hope he recovers fully

2007-11-30T14:35:00.000+08:00

Prom night itself was ok BUT the date was STUPID!!!I seriously dunno wth is the sch councilors doin?!!!!TUES evry damn club and shop was closed early on tues!!!!WTF??!!! even christ church have their prom on WED(which is mambo night) AT RITZ!!!!!!!Apparently sec sch has better management den shitty ijc=_= ok tts all for my complains, bcos the date itself was damn stupid so we all jus walked around all night=_= ya basically tt was it and we took fotos while waiting for the train.....wat a after prom life rit?!!! yes yes there was a disco in the ball room but it was nt as gd as in the clubs u noe?T.T but the only nice part was the taking of fotos........

well anyway here are some of the fotos i took, these fotos are nt bad lo considering they were taken using my hp...haha,3.2pixel=)

we were bored so we went to the poolside haha nice rit?

12j boys nt all la

we look lk a boy band, cos all colour theme abt the same!!!we din planned it seriously!!!but shawn and enrico were rlly like a boy band cos they wore similar stuff

Look at them both , on the right see wat i mean?

well there are more to seen at the album here=) still collecting frm the others

http://s221.photobucket.com/albums/dd269/Jessensiew/

Prom night

2007-11-30T14:34:00.001+08:00

Photobucket Album

2007-11-24T23:15:00.000+08:00

Want to see my prom outfit?haha xiang de meh on wed ba.....mus keep it secret haha!!!But today was fun la went out shopping with tien and lim, too bad yong din come(jj dun blame me, blame his mum)...and at least they let me help them choose their prom clothes !!tts why it was fun for me ma.....

but the 1st shop we went the auntie siao wan, let the both of them try this try that ,wah then they say see see 1st she buay song..Some more say i traitor for suggesting go see other shops but i mean her suggestion for lim was rlly ugly lo.....and the shop assistant even though she was hot but she was a BIMBO..

assistant:wat sch ur from?
me: innova jc lo
assistant: oh wat is it huh?do computers wan isit? ur jc special jc lai de huh?
me: thinking to myself, "tiao.....we not computer sch leh" oh no la we also do same stuff as other jc lk maths and science...=_=
then the assistant and auntie kept saying wah this one traitor one sentence the frens all kana psyco liao something lk tt.....then accuse shawn of saying that he wanted to alter when he was trying nia lo....wtf!!! The river island assistant that helped me with my clothes during shopping had way way way better service! (its lk heaven and hell)But anyw ,luckily we escaped with the aid of lim's sarcasm.....and they bought cheaper and better looking clothes....if not it would have been bad!

then later ended the day by watching a movie with arshad and chong, we watched enchanted. It was fairly ok , reasonably romantic and 100% fairytale......

2007-11-24T01:54:00.000+08:00

WOOO!~virgin clubbing experience in MOS jus came back...haha saw shaw tien there somemore but i better cos i went with sis's frens and bro so its FREE alcohol!!!

Considering i noobshit, my alcohol threshold was high lo....i downed a 'lambourghni', tequilla shot, tequilla boom and half a jug of cranberry vodka and another cup of orange vodka...haha scary ya?for a beginner lk me....but it was ok la only felt abit seh seh but i was not overly high or wat....but it was a super fun experience la and seriously the gals there were 100% HOT especially when dancing la!!!it was fun for me la i dun mind gg another time tts why i so excited thinking abt aft prom clubbing!!!at ZOUK its gonna be fun man especially when there are ppl in the grp who are experienced liao including me?!!!SO LOOK OUT PROM MATES dun think of gg home early tt nite and be a freaking wet blanket hor!!!

look abit drunk but i was not lo cos of the lights inside!!!

there are more fotos la but mus get frm sis fren ....haha it was rlly a fun experience!!!

2007-11-22T23:25:00.000+08:00

HELO!!! was so bored i went blog skipping then skip to dawn yang's blog...darn she sure has a good life travelling around partying evryday w/o working!!!! well, even though tt's on the surface its surely a pretty gd life especially when u're a hot gal some more

prom table seatings are out, and there are lotsa of activities chalet and bbqs hope my dear wallet can take it=( well SAT is the big day to get clothes..nt we suan yong but alot of ppl are rlly expecting wat he will be wearing...YONG u BIGSHOT liao lo haha so there will be 5 to 4 consultants(us) to dress THE MAN up for the BIG PROM so as to look gd for prom and the gals at the clubs haha jkjk

2007-11-21T22:48:00.000+08:00

YAY!!!!!but nt tt yay haha...the last day of A's wasnt as high as i thought it was an normal day.....except for the basketball and foto taking of our "RI" class....

and when evryone was at orchard all was totally shagged out to even shop for clothes so the shopping was kinda stupid=_= but we took nice fotos during basketball thx to zy

this was one of the interesting ones

class foto look at yong!!!!!!!LOL

we wanted to jump,

but ended up lk this LOL

for more of our class fotos go this add below,

http://picasaweb.google.com/ij.0612j/07Nov2002

2007-11-17T05:42:00.000+08:00

HLO!!!its 5 in the morn and i jus came back home!!Aft a bath wanted to blog....so here i am^_^

Today chem mcq paper end le!!!i was super happy it was ok la....then had to rush home to go help mum at her stall....it was boring la had to lk stay until 10 pm....then later went bowling with bro...haha it was loads of fun la cos we bet on movie tickets and I WON!!so its one free movie for me...wahahaha

then when the night was still young(1 .a.m.) we decided to go prawning, so i anything lo even though abit unsure at first...so we started prawning aft reaching the place....

wah si bei sian lo we lk prawn for 2 hours and got nothing?!!!but at the point when we lost hope we caught our 1st freaking prawn!!!!!haha then it got more fun la cos i caught 3 and bro caught one haha...BUT we spent 3 hours catching 4 prawns....tts hw hard it was but it was rlly fun unless u are lk a cleanliness freak... haha and the best part was i caught a super big wan and it had a tag....the tag on the prawn means i got $20!!!haha its rlly fun

the place i went is had taman jurong inside yunam garden der 1 hour $13 buy 2 hour get 1 hour free=)

front view of prawns haha...represents me and my siblings me being the smallest

tadaa biggest one caught by me (its not that big in the pic)

2007-11-13T20:14:00.000+08:00

!!!!!!!tml is econs paper!!!aft tt is 90% FREEDOM!!!!!!!!but today chem paper 2 was unsure...sianz and such a coincidence tt we saw ms ang on the train home and she said it was unexpectedly EASY!!!wth!!!i wan to get A for chem de leh.....pray pray....damn i just can't stand the way he speaks of himself, super self centred.......i pray i wun lose to him!!!!!shit i seriously dunno wat to study for econs and have been slacking today away....screw me ~~~!!!!!!!!!!
24 hours to 90% freedom.....=)

2007-11-12T16:51:00.000+08:00

Even though phy paper went well but i was sooo IRRITATED!!!!!ARGHHHHHHHH!!!!people!!! sometimes talking too much makes you look lk one big F***!especially if evrything you are talking abt is yourself u will look lk a bigger F***! Grrrr, the self- centeredness, oh please!!!!! u dun rlly need to say things urself abt URSELF if ppl dun ask!!!! super du lan.....sometimes we just need a hard punch from reality to rlly see wat a piece of shit we have been ( like me sometimes) but man tt person rlly needs a punch evryday!!!Have a little bit of EQ man!!!U and your overated EGO....

i feel so F***ed up yes to a extent i keep using the word.....haiz evryone (around me)is gg abroad aft A's and i tot i could go japan...but it was such a concidence tt 'the being higher up' had to drop a bomb and there goes japan trip...T.T yaya frens alwas say i so rich , but its not lo!!!its just tt my family can afford little things lk giving me more pocket money but i have nver gone abroad more then ONCE!!!!!! I feel so fed-up bcause i tot i could finally go abroad aft a fucking jc sch life full of cramping notes and bull shit....WHY???!!! man...why? And ppl pls dun think lk 'u could have saved wat' I did ok so dun anyhw think its just tt its not enough....by 60% and who the hell wants to go abroad alone?!!! arghhh!!!sigh*

Life is sometimes a composition things happening at the wrong timing....

2007-11-06T22:25:00.000+08:00

wat is maths paper 2?!!!LOL!!it went damn well la.... haha it went so well that we went to watch STARDUST aft tt.... haha

it was a super nice movie !!!i won't spoil the movie for ppl who haven watched it but it was a super nice romantic movie>.<>

i don't know for the dudes la but the part totally dissolved my heart=) and woo the female lead was rlly pretty!!!! just fit for a 'star'

see?!!!tts why when she confessed my heart just melted(+.+)but my gf doesnt have to look lk this la, if not i would die singleO.O or unless a miracle happen and turn me into WORLD's MOST HANDSOME GUY!!LOLLLLL its the feel tt matter la.

But i meant to say, just having someone u like show u that she or he likes u back it is a vry sweet thing, it doesnt have to be a fairytale...haha

the sweet feeling tt lingers....watch it with ur gf wor or bf=)

2007-11-05T18:35:00.001+08:00

YES!!!today chem paper 3 over le=) have confidence in it....all the papers gg on well...but ECONS!!!!scared abt it la but its so diff to study something which u have no interest in it=_=
well mus get over and done with jus ONE time....but these days i feel so lethargic argghhhh buck up buck up>.<
carn wait till econs paper over
carn wait till the time where i can absolutely play and laze w/o a sense of remorse!!!!!!!
carn wait till i can go out evryday
carn wait till i can jus be FREEE!!!!!!!
20th kuai lai arh!!!!
but i absolutely want to wait long long for enlistment LOL.....i'm gg in single 'sad case' LOL jkjk=)

2007-10-25T20:25:00.000+08:00

last post before A'S!!!so excited!Do u noe wat is the smell of A lvls, is odourless but when u take a deep breath and think abt the days to A's ur heart starts beating faster.....tts the smell...

Woah these few days have been lightspeed man, but come to think of it the whole of jc life have been lightspeed..haha so many things i 'forgot' to do haha including forgot to study hard during jc1:P The next 25 days would be so ......, lol i cant even think of a word to express it time?! But after that its FREEDOM!!! and a 'all guys' prom (LOL) but i only have 1 mth of it!!!cos i am gg to book in on 11th jan! and although i am abit happy i 'got in' but its seems lk gg through another round of suffering=_=haiz sian nt even enough time to get a gf...LOL!!jk la for now its BOOKS!!!
good luck for all the shitty CHAO MUGGERS out der, rock on for A's!!!!!!!!!!

2007-10-13T16:14:00.000+08:00

Was it because of the diversity of our cultures, or the conflicts between individuals tt we had abt each other i never quite figured out why things couldnt work out. I alwas see others and i envy even though with their differences they can come as one in times, its heart aching if when i see ppl saying '' i will nver forget those days'' whereas for me those days would never b forgotten due to the pain, weren't we supposed to give each other support and pull each other through this difficult times of A's? So many questions yet there is alwas no answers, even though there were times when i thought mayb time would bond us together but apparently time din help...It was rlly obvious tt day such things din rlly matter to other ppl ,having time spent with each other werent all of use supposed to feel a thing? Ppl say ''i love my *****'but i think it would make me really uneasy to say tt, its so difficult yet so wasted, haizzzz why are they like tt?or mayb i din tried anything either....

2007-10-13T00:35:00.000+08:00

SCH is over!!!haha today its the 1st time we took fotos as a class in a long time but it was only the boys the gals all dunno go wer...well let's not tok abt tt nth special anyway but today someone moved me,haha and tt is MR Chow he is such a unselfish and nice teacher among all the teachers i bliv he has given the school the most he can....tt is rlly wat a teacher is...i amrlly glad tt i had great teachers this year, i am happy this year ended so well=)

2007-10-10T19:48:00.000+08:00

The energy is high, pratically evrything the teacher says seem so motivational, but when u think abt it it was supposed to be motivational...tts why it makes evrything seem so unreal, besides i can't rlly seem to soak in the energy=_= econs is sooo freaking demoralising!!!! damn it arh!!!!!

its so tiring even though i am not lk rjc kias who are lk mugging shit now, but why why why!!i feel so tired?wat is wrong=(20 days 20 days!!!!!jyjy!!!
psychologically trapped!!!!i feel so erm, u see! i dun even noe wat i feel now damn freaking random....ppl pls cherish o lvl times!!!

2007-10-06T21:24:00.000+08:00

It takes a second to have a dream, but it takes alot to fufill one....

yay!finally last lesson of maths tutionwas starting to get so sian, the trip alone was agonising haha cos dun have shwn tien n lim crapping abt each other...haha
but it was partially agonising cos i kept thinking abt the wasted opportunity!!!!argh!!i was wondering if i could do something, but i 'hum'med out...omg i was so freaking dao la did noe wat happen my mind was blank la...lol too mich to handle for a guy lk me LOL!!!

2007-10-04T21:55:00.000+08:00

Life sometime changes the way u never expected....one fren of mine who left ijc is now shooting commercials in tv lk crazy....i tink some would realise who i'm toking abt? so envious of her la she is earning big bucks now who knows mayb few years down the road when i am slogging to earn a keep she is alrdy one of the top models in singapore....sometimes if u are just lucky in life u rlly are!!
But i guess i do have some luck if not i would not keep improving my grades....but if only if only i could be luckier....Paul C alwas say ppl who work hard derserve to be lucky haha...dunno la if tt is true why he still nt lucky enuff to get a hot galfren?LOL!! wateva la back to studying!!!!

2007-09-30T00:08:00.000+08:00

>.< sch is ending!!!!!!!!in 1 week MORE or 2!!!!haha hmm actually i rlly have nt much to say.....HAHA!but i am glad that i made gd frens in j2....well there is alwas ups and down in life but sometimes taking it with a pinch of salt makes life better.....

i can feel it coming, haha i mean my A's result at least i dun feel helpless anymore...and its great improvements for me la!! lk i was during last year's promos if only i stretch harder ...yarrrrrr!!!!=)

something so perfect on the surface not necessarily means its perfect inside, i rlly wonder wat can a person ask for more when he has something which ppl envy?hmm i guess i am jus bored to be thinking abt all these shit....omg i am so freaking random=_=

2007-09-25T16:11:00.000+08:00

hehe this is the cake sis bought!!!

special pic bro and me took!!! siew and simpsons family!!!

ths today for tien wc ttc and rico for their treat at gelare appreciated it=)but i was glad abt something esle today haha surprised by you...=)

2007-09-25T00:27:00.000+08:00

WOOO!officially 18! m18 movies liqour and clubs>.< actually i nt so bo liao to wish myself happy bdae, but something special happened at the stroke of midnite. Jus when i was revising, a sms came in and it was from a old fren even though its a simple sms it rlly made me happy=)well this fren was there for me when i needed her, though we din tok much but she was the 1st to rmb my bdae! thx sh!

On the surface, they were talking jokes but it was rlly nice of the guys to rmb it even though sometimes they dun seem lk frens who care but they do at certain times la....haha, it is better now=)

2007-09-24T00:33:00.000+08:00

WOOO!!!30 days to A's feeling the jitters>.< but well rather then worry ,STUDY!!!haha rest lk shit for 4 days liao power up alrdy hahaha its time to chiong chiong chiong!!!

well today felt vry special when listening to the song 'Home' by chris daughtry, reminded me of the things and hw my family was derT.T it was so touching this time i heard it dunno why?! Anyww 'Qiang Qiang' by ella of S.H.E is also vry vry nice go dl it and send it to me if u have it pretty pls????(sry me noob blogger lazy to find the song to put on blog)

Anyw thx sis for the bdae cake it was damn nice shall put the fotos later...love it alot=)grateful for the things i have=)
bdae wish!...............................
but wouldnt it be better if i got tt another one wish that i have wishing it would happen all these years?

2007-09-19T23:32:00.000+08:00

Today i enjoyed gg out with a bunch of classmates i am nt so close to....but it turn out they are rlly understanding ppl. Sometimes if u rlly try to adpt to different situation u get a different result and its lk a nice blend of fruit juice=) well had fun with them today la too bad we din take fotos or something=_=

but there are other good things too at least now i noe there is improvement in my results from the teachers.....and have ur ever had a kind of feeling that even though u may not noe a person well but sometimes mere words from them can make a difference in ur mood? haha tt's all i am gg to say lo......

''jenny'is nice!!!and u feel like jenny to me hahaha

2007-09-16T18:41:00.000+08:00

haizhaiz....well i am bored...haha but just now was fun....cos me and bro sddnly went lunatic and started shooting pearls at each other(those pearls from bubble tea).....haha childish rit?but damn fun. At that moment rlly felt so relaxed and lk forgot abt evrything, sort of went back in time, well it was nice having tt kind of feeling though even though it was temporary=)

yay prelim 2 pls b over and give me my results, hope i do better this time round...then its YQ bdae!!!haha no joke YQ we r celebrating it for u!!!!!haha well since its falls nicely on marking day so why not?haha but i am still bored can anyone tell me how RJC ppl study? can they rlly sit there lk 10 hours and study non stop?o.O tt would be way cool man teach me plsssss?pretty pls??

u can make a whole lot of difference if only u rmb, do u?

2007-09-14T20:59:00.000+08:00

maths n econs over le!!!maths was nt tougher than prelim 1 la hope i get better grade then prelim 1 even for econs i felt i tried harder this time for econs....its left phy and chem considering paper 2 i sux shit, so jy for the rest!!!*gulps down lingzhi water*haha

2007-09-10T21:09:00.000+08:00

hmm disgusted by someone today, one big asshole acting ignorant and all.....f him!!well not me someone mayb?

well shall not be bothered but ppl do u noe something?i think incense paper is a demerit gd man?!with all due respect but can't ppl jus burn the incense(i think i spelt it wrongly wateva la)
with more consideration and not smack it into the bin and let all the ashes fly out or something? Worst there are ppl who buy lk $100 worth of it and find a spot below the HDB and burn it!!!WTH is the freaking bin for?!!!!are u ppl blind or something?i am just saying the least they could do is to burn their paper in the bin rather then all over the place, causing ppl to accidently step on them and get possesed or something.....damn~!

haiz , mayb i am over-reacting ....today chem was lkp =( last qns i noe hw to do and yet i din have time and ECONS y isit so hard to pass the subject???????arghhhhhhh!!!but i think i have a weeny little bit of chance of passing shen bao you god bless me

2007-09-09T01:04:00.000+08:00

argh!!!sianz!!mum bought some expensive lingzhi and made me drank lingzhi water, i am so hyped up now that i can't sleep!!!!but i want to sleep...=_= still gt chem to study=_=

well the only nice thing tt happen today was watching jacky wu show at 11:30pm today they had this couples section, aww so sweet if only i had a gf who cares for me and studies with me....well tts jus a wish, putting that aside the ling zhi rlly works!!!nt tt i am exaggerating or wat but i absorb things quite well today!and i feel so energised to study but due to the late night syndrome i jus to sian to study le=_+ wat to do ?! ppl are studying so hard wth am i doin?!!!!haha anyw ppl out there plz cultivate good studying habits in ur kids, cos obviously mine suck shit now if not i would have been in rjc?!haha well back to papers and more papers...

hmm, suddenly life feels lk a drama cos of the soap operas happening around me....can't teenagers jus learn to let go??wat is wrong with tweens today huh? or mayb is me who is ignorant well its subjective la.....

2007-09-06T20:01:00.000+08:00

haiz haiz....as exams are nearing i suddenly have mixed emotions, happy tt school is ending and i am rlly nervous abt A's. Worst of all, why does all good things come to end, just when evrything is gg well, someone had to drop the bomb! Evryone is stress and sddnly it seems lk i need to strive harder...well its not lkp i will flunk my A's jus tt its kinda uncertain to whether..haiya dunno la evrything is abit rocky now=(

but on the brighter side, i can't wait for the short period of slackness tt i can enjoy aft A's!!woo~~well well i am so random these days...i miss toking to alot of ppl anyw....especially U!haha it can be anyone wor dun think too much hor!haha

2007-08-31T16:45:00.000+08:00

went back to hyss today, it was nostalgic=) well, i am srry for nt gg back to ijc, but to be honest i miss hyss way too much....ya i am grateful for wat my jc tutors have done and its not lk i wun shpw appreciation so, ppl pls judge me aft u read my post....gg der back was abit nice even though nt the whole class went back but they are ppl who rmb me tts gd enuff...>.<

haha anyw i notice a huge huge difference between jc and sec gals during my visit to hyss, it is sec sch gals rlly have alot alot of time to dress up..most sec 3's and 4 's look good der....i nt being a gal fanatic or wat la just saying wat i feel ,the gals in our sch look are way too busy to look good so as the guys hahaha....and its rlly nice gg back cos my frens nvr fail to make me laugh, haha and they forgot some of the other classmates which funny!

mayb its rlly bcos of the spare time and relax environment in sec sch we have, the bond shared with sec sch frens is strong....jc is lk working in a hectic society alrdy, ppl are jus too busy mugging rather then rlly gg out to play or wat somehow it rlly seems lk we jus make do with wateva frens we find along the way in jc.....hey but i was lucky enuff to find good frens in jc also
well, sentinmental me aft gg bac to hyss haha!ths hyss for the memories=)
shall post foto!!!=)

2007-08-20T16:47:00.001+08:00

tired and bad day somehow today i am vry worked up over small matters but i bliv i am not the only one.....telling me "talk abt urself b4 u talk abt others" rlly jus set off the bomb, did u talk abt urself b4 u alwas tok abt me? i was pissed basically bcos i don't rlly like ppl to act lk they know me more than i do when actually U DON'T!! evryone has their own faults man, if i were to name mine it would be a long list, tt doesnt mean u my fren or other ppl have a shorter list of faults...thanks for being straight forward abt evry single thing man, well i take it with a pinch of salt if u rlly have any thing u are uncomfortable with jus say it out u don't have to show it with actions, it would only make things way worse....evryone has a bad day once in a while but not only one person has a bad day, dont come expecting evryone to undstd u have a bad day and do things for u ....i dont noe wat is gg on, it jus 'tastes more sour' these days.....

ppl who don't have a clue wat is gg on just shut up.....i dun need ur freaking opinions abt my matters....well if u rlly want to be an asshole and post sacrastic remarks jus say it and move on with ur LIFE!

2007-08-18T00:39:00.000+08:00

bad bad bad....phy was unprepared and maths, too nervous le until i 4gt to use GC discovered it aft consulting mdm chan...the qns were actually easy=_= haha but the funny part was shawn tried to disturb wen long by imitating his cough in the end mdm chan saw him glancing at wen long and tot he was trying to cheat...lol tired tired tired evrywer sddnly seems to be a inconducive place to study...-_-

2007-08-15T22:08:00.000+08:00

woo~VA was nt bad, the assessment was damn boring at 1st but later it was fun when i started toking to the boys der....but apparently most ppl say commander is sai kang warrior...hahah especially wen long who strongly advocate i should not go into commando...well wateva take wateva comes la its not lk i desperately want to go der....

been quite tired these few days i dunno wat is wrong...even when i sleep enuff hours i still feel damn lethargic...wth is wrong with me?do ur ppl have this kind of problem? well sch is fine la, except mus work harder then i am now, right now is only 60 % of siew power....LOL
and i think the 3 longs are rlly bored to death these few days, haha kept playin with the shawn and xuan thing...its getting bored le must find things to spike it up !!!hahaha

can ur help me think of a cure to cure lethargy?anyone?anyone?

2007-08-11T00:51:00.000+08:00

just when u thought evrything was ok, there was trouble...haiz well wateva i'm sick of it and dun rlly wish to be invovled or anything=_= all i want to say is it was someone's fault...well tok abt the sad life in jcT.T well forget abt the work load and evrything, basically it was not tt stress cos i din work as hard as those dudes in renown jcs....so can't say i'm rlly stressed out. Yup continuing frm the sad jc life, so many things are brought up in my mind, my first time celebrating bdae for a new classmate, my new mates, and the worst, my first brush with the harsh reality of life which sort of chg my outlook in jc...dun wish to emphasis it was plainly a bad experience but it taught me lessons....

along the way met frens i tot i valued apparently my actions din show it and slowly we drifted apart...well i think its better nw at least we dun quarrel lk we use to now that he has his own gang of frens, good for him=)but somehow still feel abit suan suan de when i think of the things that happen between us that caused wat has bcom of us...(i am so not toking abt the black guy who sees me as a stranger nw)haha well shawn oso shared the same view tt jc life was sad and it pulled out my memories so tt explains me being abt emo and long winded now....jc life ending in 2 more mths however it seems so wasted whenever i look back, well u noe wat rlly represents my feelings now is' thks fr the mmrs' but no thks also....well if u rlly have things to comment abt my post pls, jus f*** off evryone needs to thrash things out and yes i want to thrash this out on my blog, its my business.....=)

2007-08-07T22:32:00.000+08:00

hehe did u ppl noe the legends of ijc are staying near my hse? haha its kinda weird, but ur noe there is 1 19 pointer in ijc who gt 3 A's? and the other 4A's guy the rafheal or dunno wat oso live near jurong cos to me it was cos my result sux tts why i went ijc, and the legends of ijc oso once had the same experience as me, they must have had lots of determination la mus take them as example..=)ya its abit dramatic but they do inspire me little,haha....haiz but sometimes i think abt it abit sad cos our tution teacher hor laughed when we said we stayed in jurong and studying in woodlands...=_= but he is a good teacher la, anyone who laugh...and hor one bad gal hor once said i had the jurong lookT.T means i gt stupid lookla isit?.........haha jk la i nt angry hehe yays 4 days weekend perfect time to catch up more and not burn out...woohoo!!!

2007-08-03T18:57:00.000+08:00

hehe went out with the people i love most, FAMILY! haha though it was nth much but we took neo prints haha, 1st time i took with my mum who takes neoprints with their family?ME!

this is mum's 1st time taking neoprint haha but she is quite spontaneous abt it...but she was rlly shock when she heard neoprints was abt $11 something haha!

Chubby sis!!hehe vry cute rit?

tadaa last one the 4th one was a bad shot cos the machine was so fast and full of jap we didnt noe wat to choose...hah

August le, so fast when i look back to the neoprints i took with the people i met in jc sddnly vry gan dong ...especially those with chong and tabby, hah i still rmb tt time i made them took two times at heeren but being the nice ppl they are they agreed haha....well now too busy to let ur see the fotos some other time ba....i rlly wonder would i miss this sch vry much? haha mayb the nice ppl i met along the way only?:X

i hope we could talk more......

2007-07-26T19:18:00.000+08:00

heyhey jus a random blog....just few days b4 when i saw sis writing a bdae card for her fren and the gift she prepared, i was so touched tt i gt teary..haha it just made me ponder whether in my life i have frens who would do the things sis do for her fren...its nt the bdae gift tt she gt for her fren but the sincerity and warmth hidden inside the gift. HAh suddenly i am so emo, mayb as a fren i din treat my frens lk the way i want them to treat me, so i apologize to long n shawn and other frens if sometimes i treat ur badly=(...

well lets not talk abt tt, ah let's tok abt sch....the stress is starting to get to me, arh work so hard for the 1st time in my life and i rlly feel for those who wrk rlly hard but have yet gain approval from teachers due to their bad results...sometimes all we want is a little approval, a little understanding to jus drive us; sometimes a few words like 'keep it up, i can see improvement' could make us see things a whole lot different.And i thank some of the teachers who do tt.

oh ya!Mr chow he came to class with a super weird mood today mayb the stress is getting to him as well, but sometimes his lessons are rlly fustrating. How do u say it? Its totally not interactive he calls us to give ideas and before we even finish our sentences he interupts and just start pumping us with ideas. I do agree his ideas are damn good but he's the only one talking and he is talking so damn BLODDY FAST tt sometimes its jus so difficult to catch!!!!I feel so fustrated sometimes, i mean lk if u want to provide us with ideas then pls make it slower man!we are trying hard, but he talks as if he is rapping a jay chou number....=_=well tts basically all abt sch life la...other then ridiculous stories abt my fren's relationship and day to day fun abt BEST FRENs hahah i jus hope when this is over its rlly over if u get wat i mean....

2007-07-18T17:53:00.000+08:00

LOL have u ppl read xia xue's latest entry? i persoanlly think its freaking hilarious!!!well even though its rlly rude but i totally agree with her abt the steven shit guy, haha he is lk wat?self obessesed?haha and the retaliation video he made just a bigger asshole, scolding vulgarities in the video was a 'smart' move ....i wonder which blind gal would date him,so full of himself.
But the whole event is rlly funny and his english is rlly 'powderful' la how i hope he is the one setting the cambridge papers man, if tt was the case GP is full marks for all the jc students =) Disgusted by the fact he calls himself shuai in the video....3 letters for him WTF!!reminds me of sis's fren tt asshole who keeps picking on her...why are there such guys around=_=they just totally ruin singaporean men's image!
i bet there is surely gg to be some heated conversations around but seriously don't you all think tt singaporeans need a little drama day - to -day?

2007-07-17T21:12:00.001+08:00

quite sianz so just blog awhile to relax abit..hah woot finally bought the levi's tee i so wanted and my pants but felt lk i was sinning when i went shopping haha cos din study ma....but wateva la
well well , nothing has been up lately except the SIMPSONS movie! lol even though i am not a big fan of the simpsons but the movie seems interesting will watch it when it's out.....so lethargic recently haven been sleeping well=_= well wateva la i just have to endure a few more weeks...

2007-07-11T22:47:00.001+08:00

today is a day full of hope for me...lol sounds crappy but its true!!haha today during gp Mr chow (a.k.a Tubby) lk checked our scripts to spot our grammer errors and yeah my compo was error prone but tubby said something which gave me hope. HAh, he said " luckily u r not one of the worst and if u chg ur little mistakes at the end of the year u could get a B'. When he said tt , he looked lk an angel HAHA but it gave me hope cos tubby said its possible to get a B so it means der is a chanz....and i was utterly srry to ms shen for skipping econs lecture to do survey nvm i will make up for it.

Then aft a short tiring day mr chiu called all most j2 to LT1 to talk abt hw impt H1 and gp is la blah blah la, but throughout thre lecture also made me fell lk i could do something in my life i could create a choice for myself, i want to be able to choose where i can go and not lk let fate choose my path(which is wat has happened to me since pri6)lol!so ya i did feel motivated=)

days of silence makes evrything seem abit uneasy

2007-07-09T21:27:00.000+08:00

T.T it's july ppl!!it's july!!! 3 more mths ppl! haha abt emotional abt it, the things i went through in jc seemed to flash back all at once, unexplainable haha! well anyw got back most results my hard wrk paid of for phy but not for chem apparently it was so diff tt most ppl in the sch failed and econs haiz~~~ left maths pls>.< pls let me get a C or B well it doesnt matter anyw cos sis told me, no matter hw many times u fail or hw badly u fail, it ain't over till u give up on urself b4 the big A's...so kampahtei!!!!!A A B C B is my ideal grade!!lol i'll try i'll try =) good luck to all jc dudes out der and jc mates 3 more mths ppl and its bb to freaking jc life=D * beaming with teary eyes* hahahaha
Libra - Your Love Profile

Your positive traits:

You are open minded enough to date outside your typical "type" ... successfully!
You are diplomatic - and likely to end a fight instead of dragging things out.
You are easily loyal and faithful, but only for the right person.

Your negative traits:

You're a bit gullible, and partners take advantage of you. You still may not know it.
You find it difficult to decide where to go to dinner, what movie to watch, who to date...
You have to be in a relationship, or else you just don't feel like yourself.

Your ideal partner:

A smooth talker who enjoys socializing as much as you to.
Someone classy and cultured who knows which wine to order with dinner.
Is beautiful to you - although not necessarily attractive in the traditional sense.

Your dating style:

Romantic. If your date comes bearing flowers, wine, and poetry... well, your heart soars.

Your seduction style:

Giving. Your lover's pleasure is as important as your own.
Soft and sensual - you don't like anything to be rough.
Extravagant ... your fantasy involves staying at a five star hotel with your love.

Tips for the future:

Don't be so quick to compromise in relationships - and you'll get taken advantage of yes.
Try being single for a while. Seems impossible, but you'll learn so much about yourself from doing so.
Make some decisions about your romantic life, right now. You'll be happy that you did.

Best color to attract mate: Green

Best day for a date: Wednesday

What's Your Love Profile?

its so interesting!!try it u may get unexpected surprises!!haha i was bored anyw:Pand i nt tt extravagant la it has some points its nt true but the love part its quite true..LOL

2007-07-08T00:46:00.000+08:00

argh!its so infuriating!!!can't bliv how a guy can lk make mindless comments abt ppl especially when its a gal who is my sister....nobody is freaking perfect so spare a tot for their feelings b4 u make a damn comment...and if u happen to make a wrong comment say SRRY!!i couldnt bliv it when sis told me one of her fren's guy fren made rude remarks abt her, freaking shit tt person he doesn't even know wat is basic courtesy for a woman, damn 30 year old virgin if he has a gf the gf mus be a mentally retarded gal...i mean lk who would see any good in this kind of guy who go around making freaking comments abt gals he is not tt close with jus bcos they dun have an hour glass figure?!!!!especailly in front of her!!tts freaking worse then those who gossip!wth!!!!ppl who are overweight mus die la? isit u S.O.B!!(sry for my use of language but tt guy is rlly an freaking asshole)
spoilt my whole day!!if he ever let me see him i will make him noe wat itz lk to be insulted....grrr
haiz, anyw mdm chan pulled her ' u have no time left' stunt on us and the' some of u did badly' stunt omg...i feel so stupid=_= but i will try hard de!!its live earth!!evrybody wear green today!!!!if u have green shirts=)

sometimes i hope i could show more concern...but i am afraid

2007-07-04T22:47:00.000+08:00

SPeciaL events...
well today prelims is finally OVER!!!have a gd feeling abt phy P2...so very happy and went home immediately to accompany long to go buy his fren's bdae present...as usual we did our scouting..LOL and then we came upon a store in cine lvl 1, the store is abt custom made toys vry cute de!!its so cute tt alot of gals would say cute tt kind too bad i forgot to take a pic le sry=( so after standing der for lk 30 mins? long finally made up his mind with wise suggestions from ME..haha
ok the interesting thing is, when we were walking out of cine towards take, a guy sddnly approached us and claim to be a scout for models say looking fresh faces for their agency...lol then i was lk huh?!cos i noe i am not tt handsome,haha
so dunno y ,i gave him my contact when he asked for it...haha mayb it was out of desperation he approached me but then it gave me a tinge of sastifaction...LOL but this kind of thing sure fake de as long said so i threw away the guys namecard aft he walked off...so walked around felt so sad, bcos 'pull n bear' T shirts were so nice and were so cheap but i din brought enuff money so i jus had to let it go T.T....well then it was finally time for collection of the present so we walked back to cine even though it was a short walk it was quite xin ku for me...cos i brought alot of things....

so the 2nd interesting thing was, when we walked back a woman who was frm the same agency approached me again>.

the feel of prelims 1 over and A's drawing nearer is unexplainable through words

2007-07-02T17:43:00.001+08:00

Moments of happiness!!

well well well prelims finishes in 2 days!!short moment of happiness=) anyw sry to xueqi mei n eugene i alwas forget to add ur too forgetful le especially xue qi din mean to dao u in the train today i tot u din see me so i waited till i alighted then say bye...and leave ur blog add oso... lost it:Phmm...hope i can get lesser U's then block test...

我要自由，我要快乐。。。而我的快乐就读完jc...然后进大学！！i dun want to look back again, i want to be someone who can be independent and have achievements...but somehow evryday i cant help to feel my dreams would go*bish* burst ..haiz try try keep trying!!!!

anyw its kinda sad to someone being hurt in a relationship...dun yall think so? well the person is not me of cos...but sometimes a love with too much commitment tend to hurt the most, makes me wonder when ppl break up do they rmb the things they did and said ? well i bliv evry relationship u go through u learn something, u take away lessons nt jus memories and alot of heartache, tts y relationships can be beautiful....*ugh* i was so bored i started saying things abt love until i feel mushy myself pardon me ppl....cos a dude who is so sian of studying can be vry random....well tts all la hahaHAHAHAHA:P

2007-06-21T17:46:00.000+08:00

it seems yet so fast yet nverending...the time pass so fast and the work is lk nverending....*panic* haiz i wonder wat am i gg to do aft 4 mths frm now, would i have the feeling i would fail my A's and be depressed or mayb tell myself there is hope n enjoy lk siao and do the things i alwas wanted to do? scary....but i aft 4 mths i dun think i would b depressed even if i think i wun do well for A's LOL its playtime why spoil it? and then do the things i want to do go on a small holiday, work earn money and hehe...*secret*

2007-06-10T22:05:00.000+08:00

hmm yiling teach me phy la lol! study is soul refreshing cos it relieves my guilt...haha but sometimes procrastination has the upper hand=( evrything seems so complicated now, things used to be simple and best frens are made in 3 secs when in pri sch haha...haiz but there is so many things i want to say and yet i dunno wer to start from....i dun understand it?somehow it alwas feels incomplete no matter hw happy i may b for tt moment...lk tt time when i gathered with wq n jac they all it was the 1st time i laughed so hard in a long time, even though i am nt so close to them lk i used to be but somehow whenever we meet up it alwas feels the same....i belong there nt say i dun feel i belong when i am with long's i feel comfy with longs haha but i guess sometimes human have unlimited wants? well wateva life is alwas full of upsets and regrets u just gotta take it, i guess? the only biggest regret was ending somethings with a bad note...well i guess sometimes we are nt fated as frens mayb we rlly arent rlly suitable as frens?

hee the pic i took with sis n bro when at the concert well this is the only one i have la....and ya bought the 200 pound beauty OST its freaking exp!!$28 leh but it's worth i think the songs quite nice=)

2007-06-07T14:23:00.000+08:00

argh!!!!!!!!i am feeling so helpless now abt physics!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!so scared and i cannot grasp the concepts fully!!!omg can god send me someone to help me??=_= other subs still ok still can handle but PHY!!!!!!!AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH i hate jc...its a freaking shit sch life

2007-06-04T19:18:00.000+08:00

my god !today the maths test was easy but i screwed it up, 2 words---> not prepared...no more test comin le cos it will be prelims den A's T.T anyw the MAYDAY concert rock!!!even though most of the songs i din no hw to sing but i had a great time and the limited ed shirt designed by one by mayday was nice so i bought it...photos posting nxt time=) then today came home, bro told me she was comin i felt rlly sian but wateva la i slept for 4 hours ,omg...tts wat u get for sleeping at 130 am and wrecking ur brain for 2 hours aft oni 4 hours of slp..=( well then i woke up, then came the complains frm mum...damn it i jus hate her for alwas causing trouble for her own selfish reasons...its obvious enuff tt all of us dislike her why can't she jus try to be a nicer person...some ppl are jus f UP!!! and i dun understand hw some ppl can shake their legs non stop ( not longs or ttc , at least they would stop b4 starting again) its freaking irritating to see u shaking ur leg NON STOP!!!!well i guess this is jus typical s'pore culture ,i dun deny i shake my legs too but i dun shake lk some ppl who keep shaking and shaking lk they have high sex drive or something, go geylang la lk tt....today is a freaking irritating day due to irritating events cause by irritating individuals!!!ARHHHHHH ppl dun live for u, be considerate la....

damn it on life!!

2007-06-01T17:19:00.000+08:00

holidays or exam preperation?lol abit sian leh fell lk i lost my direction in life but nvm i am finding it....anyw it jus occurred to me today, was she expecting me to understand hw she felt bcos i was her fren or was it jus bcos i was someone who said something wrong...it nvr felt as though we were frens more lk accquaintances...ya more lk tt...i dunno why mayb she feels the same way to( she is nt a gal i lk)
tml is the mayday concert!!!quite excited to watch it>.< but ytday sis boguht bro n me a new pair of puma...which is nice made my day haha...well its jus a random post la cant wait for 5 mths later

2007-05-29T21:09:00.000+08:00

unexpected events today, but honestly i stand by wat i said...
today the lib was quiet and nice to study it was as if the lib belongs to me shawn n long de felt funny 1st time lib so quiet nice enviroment to study....and aft a long awaited week i finally tasted the goodness of gelare waffles...yum!june....4 more mths GOGOGO!!!

2007-05-24T17:55:00.000+08:00

one should nvr look too highly of urself,
bcos u will only fall deeper...
yes finally gt to play soccer but sad its the last PE lesson for this term liao...=_= however it was nt the pe tt caught my attention...i guess evryone noe wat i'm toking abt, mayb its bcos i can relate to wat she is gg through, tts why i feel for her...as in i noe wat it feels lk to be in tt position...i tink its unfair tt it happened bcos basically she didnt do anything wrong....
another thing was the 'coincident' thing, i just din felt right....
i look around and most ppl are saying hw much it chged , it rlly is the place and the enviroment....the 2 years in jc is just too difficult to build frenships which will last a long way...the time is too short and evrything happens so fast whether gd or bad tt it seems hard to grasp wat was gg on actually.Does it only apply to ijc?i dunno but i noe tt when the day comes i leave this sch i dun think i would smile n look back at ijc, the shityy workload hoorifying PW and making a fren who wasnt worth a good fren...but will surely rmb nice frens i made=)

2007-05-23T22:03:00.000+08:00

hate to have a haircut but in the end still went to REDS in PS today for a haircut, and i gt wat i liked....thx to the female hairstylist who cut my hair for me!dun mind gg back der nxt time=) and the hairstylist der their hair all so style can? especially my hairstylist, haha mayb if A's fails i can go try to be a hairsytlist?lol! hmm even though i hate to admit, i feel abit autistic!!why?! i actually had alot of things i am curious abt all these hairstylist but when i was getting my hair done i jus coulndt talk...=( and shit i think i can seem to open up to ppl, tts a serious problem!haiz but anyw even though this bothers me abit overall today was a nice day cos i even got a new buckle!!!from GUESS cos they were having a sale...wahaha wee~happy mood=)
hmm mayb i should get a hairstylist as my gf this way i can get my hair done the way i like by the gal i like....wah gd huh? haha

2007-05-21T18:57:00.000+08:00

woot!!!i finally pass NAFA...hw is tt?!!and omg most of the segments A and pull up i pulled 5 haha from zero i pulled 5 in 1 mth..hehe happy nt being zhuai jus happy i finally passed NAFA liao....thx terri n wen long for telling me i can do it=) anw tien de bdae lai le...happy bdae hope u lk ur carl's junior meal as a present!!!

made my day unknowingly...:D

2007-05-18T20:46:00.000+08:00

when u expect returns from the kindness u give, it is not kindness
because kindness from the heart need no returns...learnt this from a fren today tot it was meaningful so i am putting it here....
well today something happen, to someone...if u think tt i alwas pick on u i say i'm srry and please dun alwas take my words and evrything so seriously bcos sometimes i am careless abt saying things which stir ur emotions but honestly it was jus something casual to a fren...if u keep it to heart then i dun have anything to say...
well well today was plain boring and the GP test was extremely diffcult the sports day was....a waste of time...and please evyone has their own opinion once in a while so please dun judge other ppl's actions jus lk u dun lk me to judge u

2007-05-15T21:36:00.001+08:00

i feel srry for a fren who lost a love one recently...even though we don't know each other well...but take carez...
life is full of unpredictable changes,
so learn to cherish....

2007-05-15T21:36:00.000+08:00

i feel srry for a fren who lost a love one recently...even though we don't know each other well...but take carez...
life is full of unpredictable changes,
so learn to cherish....

2007-05-12T21:51:00.000+08:00

today din study much..lol so went tution and i bought a super nice LEVi's tee can?lol actually it was mum who bought it for me...post the photo of the shirt some other time...and its mother's day some more and she bought me something:D Then met shawn n wc while gg tution, then it was the long awaited moment, it was the 'she' lol today wc was the 'lucky' one to sit with her but aft maths it was the long awaited moment for ME!!it was 'HER' , so sad couldnt go phy tution..LOL but she was well dressed today lo unlike wat shawn said tt she has no fashion sense....haha but i guess i should b down to earth and study, afterall she's just a eye candy!!LOLthen went home to have mum's day dinner, it was some RC organised shit and we sat so near to the speaker tt my ear felt painful after sitting der lk 30 mins?! and the MC was lk SHOUTING with the mike, its lk so fake can? trying to bring up the atmosphere dun need to freaking shout so close to the mike rit? all RC organised activities for special days are kinda crap!!!NVER GO activities organised by RC's...well should i buy the game or the kappa sneakers wonder which one....YAY nxt week can chg fone le!!to a sony ericsson forgot the model name liao...but i lk the white one..wahaha

2007-05-11T21:01:00.000+08:00

hmm fri!!love FRIDAYS....aww but bro is gg to KTV hmm dun feel lk gg aft playing badminto so tired le..ZZZZZ thinking abt the homewrk...FRI IS SO SIANZ!!!but i still love the day though...haha but today something major happened...nt gonna disclose anything, but srry to my eldest 'long' for doing alot of stupid things, and in the end causing a biiger mountain for him to climb...=( srry dude rlly promise nxt time i wun over react when we walk pass her!!!!pls forgive me!!!!:O but u should have said hi....anyw srry swear i won't do it again>.< wah one week pass so fast, heheh
hmm, should i rlly bliv wat wen long said? bliv liao make me happy for no reason leh...haha from wat i learned its alwas bad to assume things based on self assumptions leh...but later i saw something which made me happier...lol it may b me rit may b me rit? hope it is leh....haha but i mean lk it is rlly nt possible based on the time period....sometimes its so difficult to talk but i jus want to noe more...haha by now most ppl would be smart enuff to noe i am talking abt rit? if dunno then its too bad for u la