7.31.2006
i sddnly tot of a ques in the middle of the night....i asked myself if i had a chance to choose between living 1 year of my perfect life and living 10 years of my normal life which would i choose? i tot n tot i am really scared of dying so early..lol but i would rather choose tt 1 year of perfect life......cos i bliv when i had alrdy achieved wat i wan in life, i dun mind dying earlier....wat would u choose my blog readers???
MY fren zi jie sent me a hroscope thingy todayand it was so damn true when i read it....the descriptions totally fits me....just so ur can try it urself
What does your favourite colour say about you? Your preference of one colour over the other can easily express your personality and character traits.
If your natural choice is the colour red, you are the outgoing type. You not only act on impulse, but you are prone to abrupt mood swings. You have a lot of compassion for fellow human beings and can be easily persuaded. Though you have an optimistic approach to life, you don't hesitate to grumble and complain as well. Your spontaneous nature is assertive, you freely voice your opinions. You have a strong sex drive and are likely to end up having extra-marital affairs, unless your strong sense of duty restrains you from indulging in wild fantasies.
The choice of this colour shows that you are basically good-natured and loyal. You are sociable but at the same time you tend to be swayed by the opinions of other people. You are a generous soul, sincere at heart. Your gestures are friendly, and inspired by goodwill. More often than not, you are overtaken by feelings of wanton elation.
(YELLOW)
If you have preference for yellow, it shows that you have a vivid imagination and lots of nervous energy. Your thoughts are clear and well organised. You do harbour a need to help the world, but you won't get the dirt under your fingernails doing that. Deep down you are a shy person and a loner; perhaps that's what makes you a reliable friend. You may not show it, but you would actually love to be respected and admired for your prudence.
Preference for the colour green shows that you are a dutiful citizen. You are not only aware but also sensitive to social customs, and bear a good name in your community. Your choice also indicates your honesty and straightforwardness. You have a normal sex drive and are very emotionally attached to your family. You have the potential to be an excellent teacher.
If your personal colour is blue, you are introspective and purposeful by nature. You hold conservative beliefs and under stressful conditions, prefer to withdraw into gentler surroundings. You seem to have a lot of control over your passions and desires, but are sensitive to the needs and feelings of others, nonetheless. You are a loyal friend and would prefer to lead a sober life.
If your choice is purple, then you are intelligent and quick-witted. You have a keen eye for detail, things which are normally overlooked by people. You are infuriated at the slightest provocation. You tend to be extremely effusive in your expressions of grief. You are a creative person and an egotist of sorts. You seem to possess a cultivated taste for the subtle in life, while recognizing the magnificent.
A personal choice of the colour brown implies that you are meticulous when it comes to work, thrifty when it comes to money, and adamant in your beliefs. You are a very reliable and composed person, not impulsive at all. You can rival a seasoned horse trader in your talent for striking the best bargain.
Your date describes you!
Dear friends there are an Italian horoscope given below. You can find a lot about you by just searching your own identity in Italian way.
What you have to do is to find your group with the help of your date of birth.
Date of Birth Group
01,06,11,16,21,26,31 A1
02,07,12,17,22,27 B2
03,08,13,18,23,28 C3
04,09,14,19,24,29 D4
05,10,15,20,25,30 E5
Group A1
You consider love as the most beautiful thing and you love to fall in love, but a number of your group members think that the person they love is not sincere with them.
You love to be with your friends and you are always found to be a dutiful friend.
You can hardly control your patients, which is a very big drawback of your nature.
The Person who is ruling your mind & heart these days is perfect for you.
Group B2
Your dreams and ambitions are much important for you and you can do everything to fulfill your dreams. Love is much valuable in your life but you always search for someone perfect. You hardly trust someone.
Your friends are really important for you but normally you hide a lot from them.
You are a deep thinker you always study the negative view as well as positive.
You can lead a happy life with a person for whom you care a lot these days.
Group C3
You always prefer mantel decisions more then emotional ones due to this you don't have a limited number of friends. You consider life a very beautiful gift and you love to enjoy its colors. There are a number of peoples who are your ideals and you loved to spend a big part of your time with them. You are found to be a very sincere lover.
You have a perfect control on your emotions but sometimes your decisions really effect your beloveds.
The person who has just appeared in your mind and you has decided to forward this mail especially to him/her is your real and special friend.
Group D4
Your always have goals to achieve and you can do everything to fulfill the dreams of those who loves you.
You have a sketch of an ideal in your mind and you always search for that personality.
Your friends means a lot to you and you can do everything for the sake of your friend, you a normally found to be an emotional personality.
You have a very less control on your patients and due to this sometimes you over react.
The one who sent you this mail & the one to whom you will send this mail first are your real friends.
Group E5
You are found to be a person who loves to love. You prefer emotional decision more then mantel decisions. You consider life just to enjoy; you are the one who is perfect to call FLURTIES.
You love to increase the list of your friends and beloveds.
You have a number of dreams but you never work hard to make your dreams come true which is the biggest drawback in your nature you take everything much lightly.
With in 7 days you will meet a person whom you have never met before that is the person ideal for you.
just for ur to noe my choices of colour was red n brown red was my preferred colour n brown was my 2nd preferred colour.....try it out NOW!!!!
today at chem lecture the chem lecture hint we are all gonna die if we slack more lk we r now....and ther WILL B NO 2ND PROMO PAPER!!!!!!!!omg!!!!!!!but i didnt feel a thing i gues in my heart i m prepared to go poly, cos seriously there is nth tt holds me bac in ijc anymore le.....alot of ppl feel the same way too....
today anyhw toktok tok sddnly toking abt new age guys shuld b total geeks, cos hot gals are bored of hunks...lol in my heart i was thinking TT is impossible...lol it this was the possibility i would have hit a home run by now....hmm i am a geek as daph says so....lol
20:54
; where did I go wrong?.
7.29.2006
tada this is the first set of the comic self of 12j classmates...frm left tabby, jessen (me), HAppy HAppy and tian cheng!!!is a bit not clear if ur wan the real thing ask frm tabby ba she has it.....
somehow it feels different cos evrything changes evryday...the people the enviroment....tts all i have to say
today when i was takng the train to sch, realise tt all those adults rit nv give way when ur alighting wan leh...is lk they mus freaking chiong in for a damn seat....i mean lk wats the point ????u rush in derthe seats would have been taken by those who didnt alight......especially ah mas n aunties i understand leg pain all this but they lk running frm robbers lk this then bum onto ppl then stare at u as if its ur fault.....singaporean spirit rlly STRONG!!!even kids oso run to the train, see this is wat resulting in foreigners having bad impression on singaporeans, its bcos parents oni teach wat they learn to their children and not teach their children wat they shuld learn...........kiasu is THE culture of singaporeans, u see it evrywer....
today toked to shawn they all about little brothers....honestly speaking they rlly find their xiao di's friggin irritating lol...no offence srry sometimes its bcos we hold diff roles, so my views rlly different frm jw n shawn.....i can rlly elaborate on it....hmm just try to figure it out ba.....
01:37
; where did I go wrong?.
7.26.2006
someone told me tt our class had changed aft the class chalet ...honestly it shocked me, cos he was one of i din expect to tell me this face to face. he said other things which was wat i thought of our class now, he even said he would like to invite evryone to his wedding in the future...in fact i would like to do tt to.......it suddenly dawned upon me, mayb he also expected the frens he made in ijc would be the wan tt would witness n share the joy of his 'big day' with him. mayb evryone felt the change ?or mayb they jus wanted to keep it in their heart? he said something which rlly made me feel so optismistic, he said we shuld not let this go on we shuld organise another chalet to gather evryone together.......it sounded especially astounding as came out from tt person's mouth. they want a change , but it seems some has alrdy grown roots in their grps of frens. sometimes i see the one who made an influence in teh class i feel lonely, cause alwas wished i did mayb i did made some but in a bad way.......
i rlly wished for a chg, for a better tomorrow
i dunno wat ur thinking even when u're in such a plight, wat r u afraid of since u think u r gg to die? why can't u jus throw away ur heroic thinking and see a doc, wat if it can b healed?then ur scaring urself for nothing!!!!! then u can do the things u want to do lk make vital stops winning goals.....if u r rlly dying, r u rlly cherishing evryday r u doin the things u regretted u have not done?
ppl if all of u knew u were gg to die tml, wat would u do....?? if u knew u r gg to die tml....
for me it will b one simple sentence, to do the things i have nv had the courage to do it....
00:14
; where did I go wrong?.
7.23.2006
evrything has been done....tt blog i wrote , it affected me alot n other ppl i guess..... i look back i dunno wat i shuld bliv wat i shuld think anymore, but only to listen to my heart
and my heart tells me to say sorry, sorry to those who was written in my blog and those who read my blog...i gues wat i want to say is sorry for writting tt blog, but i wun delete it cause no matter wat i stand by myself.....mayb someone was rit, i caused all the problems in 12j, i caused it....nw i have jus yet another barrier to overcome....i said i have chg ,i rlly did!! i dunno did others see the chg in me? or mayb i was a jerk all along? i tot jc was a place where i made frens tt wuld walked a long journey with me but 1 by 1 i lost my frens cause of my foolishness...no matter hw hard i tried to hold them back , i wun say they abandon me cause no one did tt to me.......
all i wish was to have the big 5 n noodles n me and the ppl who were der for me as one grp again ...as one whole grp.....mr yeo may be leaving at a time lk this, sometimes i feel bcos mr yeo is der evrything seems alrti,nw he may b leaving do ur noe tt?do ur have feelings?i rlly do love the frens i made in ijc, evryone seriously i am srry for all the problems i have caused.....i saw evryone forget jia wei , sung hyun and sher's bdae i was heart broken cause i have forgotten it too and it was the ppl from other class who celebrated it for sher......will my bdae b lk dis?will evryone forget it?day by day i lost the frens i tried so hard to hold on to, and day by day i got to know ppl whom i was nv close to......i rlly dun wan things to get worse, was it rlly me tt cause so much things? can someone jus bring me the harsh truth ?!!can anyone jus tell me was it my fault, so tt it can end my agony once and for all??? evryday at sch it jus gets harder n harder, i dunno hw i can make the ppl around me smile n accept me or is it jus impossible to accept me once more?......its so tiring as if i was climbing a mountain , cos i alwas try to be evryone's fren ...i rlly need someone someone tt can bring me out of all these rit now.....i wan to overcome all these things tt i have caused, once again i am srry
23:20
; where did I go wrong?.
I am vry sensitive about things,selfish and childish, i dun deny tt.......u have tried i have not seen it, then its my fault....i gues
there are things no matter hw u try to chg it, it will still be different even though it seems as though nothing happen on the surface. And pwb ur sentence 'if u need someone just say it, if not u will b in agony' shuld go to ur close fren smith..... and rit ya i use the word enemies, mayb i used it wrongly.....should be normal classmates....
anyw ya ur can say i purposely said evrything , cause i am since i can't tok abt it in sch might as well trash evrything out in my blog....ya smith u are rit btwn the both of u , its not my business...but she is my fren n she is troubled over it,i being nosey tries to help..... would u do it for pwb if someone did hm wrong? u would rit? i tried too, but it didnt appear to be successful....
honestly, i dun think i was wrong for writing tt blog, even though i was a jerk for jus directing evrything to smith n pwb.....anyway thx for those who seen my blog n tagged....
04:25
; where did I go wrong?.
7.22.2006
i rlly have so many things to say, i dun tink there's a need to hide all these....somehow i was seen as someone not so important liao...........so i dun care wat they will feel when they read this blog cos i gues they will only think it is a unreasonable wan......
let's start with one guy, something happen he left a grp of 5, he alwas says it is the grp's fault for kicking him out.....now i rlly am angry!!!ur kicked me out too, n mayb ur are saying i left the grp on my own i guess....this guy told me he wuld nv do wat the grp did to him, gues wat tada....i am the result....=) i am angry bcos even though i made a joke abt him liking someone, it din appear to me tt he had the right to go question ppl abt things.... ya the other thing i told the dota gang but did they laughed at ur or anything, jus accept getting rejected wats the biggie? MAYB U WAN TO NOE....IT WAS ACTUALLY 1 GAL FRM THE BIG 5 WHO CARED ABT U BEING EMBARESS....WER AS UR ZHI LUN WAS LAUGHING WITH ME......and humans are selfish so he would alwas wan ppl to spear a tot for him, when a gal had tried to make frens with u, u gave her colours.....but u question her of evrything, u r not her bf, u have no rit to do tt....i am angry hw come he is not seen as someone who does not spear a tot for others, but someone who needs other ppl to spare a tot for him.......... and pls LA u like the gal, jus say it u dun have to keep beating the bush then get so worked up when so many ppl noe it, u wan to noe y so many ppl noe it?cos u put all those msges in ur blog, its not only the noodles will go see ur blog...isn't obvious enuff????anyway i said alr i dun intend doin u a favour , wateva u say i m doin u bad or wat....at least i din hurt u as much as u hurt me...rit?=)
den there is a guy who calls himself pwb........since in the past u said smith was brave for leaving the 5, am i brave for leaving ur grp oso??since u tink the big 5 was wrong for not sparing a tot for smith nthey would jus ask him out for the sake of asking him out, dun u think u n smith are just the same towards me now? at least the big 5 would call, u two dun even care!!!so honestly u have no right at all to even have opinions abt them, COS UR ARE JUST THE SAME!! ur laughters are jus the fuel to my anger....i dun tink i need to hide my feeling frm u ppl.....
in the end, ur did wat u didnt want ppl to do.......anyway pwb nxt time rit if u wan tell ur beloved fren abt things rit pls jus let him question u instead.......and btw ur smith, thz man.....jus a reminder la, u have no rit to ques others.... aft this blog,i would have rlly bcom enemies with ur le......
one left, nvm one came in n took evrything.....jus fucking get lost.........and smile alwas so when i see ur smiles i can b unreasonably angry ....
04:07
; where did I go wrong?.
7.19.2006
all tt has happened....my anger lighten, but i am sad now.....today evrything was so tiring, oni one person was by my side hearing my tok....evrybody was with him, evrybody would alwas follow him n watch his back, but no one was der to watch my back ..........the guy who listen to me, i apprecite tt he listens but i bliv tt he doesnt understand my agony n plight.....
somehow i jus think that he blames me for pulling him into class politics, when at the 1st place he was not invovled, is jus tt he knows more things through my mouth, there are also things i dunno....knowing alot of thing doesnt mean u are invovled in evrything, and honestly when u keep saying sian to me it made me felt bad......it made me felt worse then ever!
evrybody would alwas think they are in a worse plight then others,
but they nvr notice the support they have is wat others wish for.....
so i am wrong to tink i m worse since nw nobody is there for me?
and tt guy who called me a ARSE, the words i said to D was not words of comfort for u,
but they to express hw i feel so broken now...
i guess u din understand.....
yes i am jealous when tt guy was all alone, he had someone to support him and understand hw he felt.....
nw i am all alone, tt sumone doesnt care cos he has his 'noodles' and there is no one who understand hw i feel.....
even though she noe the truth she stuck with them, i tot she would asked y , i gues she asked tt sumone n agreed with him.....
its alrit afterall they are a GRP of frens jus lk the ppl tt they talked abt.....
18:28
; where did I go wrong?.
7.18.2006
fucking arse huh!? u jus one big fuck la...dun nedd to make a choice cos u cant go bac to him.......wat dun wan to lie to a close one, dun give this piece of shit la!!!!now get THIS clear la la i anyhw tink to tink tt i freaking trusted u.......WTF nw ur jus A ARSEHOLE for thinking i didnt trust u? ya i am jealous u r not my best mate in class liao, but i trusted u n u openly say its a piece of crap?wat the hell loh, u r nothing but a hypocrite la, i rlly tot we were frens agin now u say all this in ur blog which means u were alwas cautious when u were being me fren.............. hahaha my ex best mate in the class actually said all this in his blog, i mean la ya la i making a big fuss but tell me ppl wat can be more hurting then this? he told me to stand by him, i did he said i shuld stand by him n i did, but wat happen but wat happen?
23:17
; where did I go wrong?.
7.17.2006
today went to hospital with mum for a day surgery, it was a simple surgery...it took abt 1 hr , i didnt tink tt much cos it was a minor operation. but as mum gt sent to the operation theatre, i kind of got worried seeing my mum so tensed.....
1 hr passed , mum was resting on the bed. the medicine wore off and mum was in abit of pain, looking at her expressions it kinda pains my heart....but later mum felt better then went to eat and shopped with mum and sis...rlly enjoyed it=)
then reach home liao actually tot could go out with shawn they all...in the end shawns parents made the move to not let him go out...wahahaha so in the end i went out with zi jie tabby loh....lol they are so nice loh even 3 ppl oso go out with me...nt lk some say if lan would come out in the end....say sianz........!!!!!!!!!wateva
signing off.......=)
16:03
; where did I go wrong?.
7.16.2006
my fren made me miss IJC camp alot...though it was 3 days, it was 3 memorable days....we cheered tgt, got tu lan tgt played games to break record tgt and we sian tgt when gt free time slp eat joke evrything tgt.....those 3 days passed lk 3 mins but aft the camp evryone sort of went back to their grps in sch.....Don't all of ur rmb this things anymore???these memories when we cheered tgt with arms on each other shoulders?those 3 days i rlly felt as if i could depend on these classmates for the rest of my jc journey.....i started laughing abt our camp performance tt day, our sound system suck tt day so when we performed ,it seem as though we were clowns, but even though i was embaressed it was my classmates performing with me, the embaressment didn't matter that much anymore....the sense of security still lives in my heart when i tink back....before the camp we celebrated evryone's bdae tgt choose gifts tgt present the gifts in crazy ideas tgt....even though some ppl were left out, but i rlly cherish those frens who walked through these mths of memorable happenings....WHY? why people?WHY? now it has bcom lk dis? can u explain? the groups that has formed the opnions that we are starting to have......y can't we all jus think abt those days n try n rmb how it felt, mus there be a barrier between the groups that has formed bcos of all the things that has happen? have ur ever stopped mayb sometimes we should not stay within the circle n go out of the circle?ya i m not acting lk i m matured or wat...but this IS the case...no one tot of it ,even if they did no one dared speak of it........be true to wat u think at least i tink i am tts why i am saying all this.......but i gues sometimes expressing is oni a way to cre8 more trouble.....life is such a diff thing
13:32
; where did I go wrong?.
7.15.2006
simply put it jc life SUX for me!!!!the failing of exams, PW and the things gg on ......honestly i pray to god pls let a miracle happen to me.....noodles, and the others......i once tot i could seek comfort if i went to either one of them, pooF! i gues my hopes were dashed.....no matter hw i smile when i go home i realised its all jus minutes of joy which passed by.....smith u rlly understand wat i mean meh?ths smith ur presence there rlly make me feel abit an hui, but no matter wat u have pan shuai n, so u may nt know wat i feel, pls dun get offended or wat but this is jus something i waned to say to u....tabby said tt evryone in our class is in pairs i sddnly realised i was one of those who did not have a partner...pan shuai pls dun say wat actually i once have a best fren in the class and bcos of my character i lost him or wat ....cos i dun tink it will make me feel better...someone said i say things which cause unintentional harm sometimes, but why do i have to feel guilty n u dun? jus bcos i do it more doesnt mean oni i have to feel guilty....
i complained so much to seek attention cos i jus simply...arh nvm nobody will understand how i feel unless ur name is call jessen....
anyway thx sj n sok hwee for comforting me n smith for understanding wat i say.....
21:48
; where did I go wrong?.
7.14.2006
i have changed...i tink so aft all these dramatic events which happen...wateva ur say it is dramatic to me ok..... in life hor....u rlly mus learn to not take things to heart...i blieve i have not done tt but i am trying to learn... especially when it comes to making frens
my brother taught me tt if ppl rlly wan to be ur fren u dun have to remind them to rmb u....
n also told me tt my character make me the biggest big fuck!!lol haha
hmm i gues i still will over react den lk start to think its wrong of ppl nt to include me , but its not wrong!!its just tt my opinions dun match with them.....
so my brother taught me to make frens who have the same interest as me....
did i chg its oni for ppl to tell me...
for now , i wan to be lk a charmeleon, camouflage whoever wants me to be with them i will be with them=) i hope got ppl wan t me to be with them la...lol!
as ur know its hard to chg in a few days, but when u are reading my blog as usual pls dun judge me if u have....cos dun u think u are not perfect also?
anyway i shuld jus take things easier in life, ok mayb i do rlly mind abt many many things!!!=)
like there are pairs of them but oni 1 of me...lol if u rlly understand wat i saying mus tell me ok?dunno wat to say i feel lk a drunk man now so i just type wateva i can think of...wahahaha
23:06
; where did I go wrong?.
7.11.2006
rojak of feelings.....sad shocked relieved
lies told, things happen and stories of our lives change....
i feel tt sometimes pwb or all the times he feel irritated by me.....smith is a nice person, but pls dun feel bad cos in the 1st place me n pan shuai alrdy nt the good frens we used to be...now u r his best mate in class:) haiz anyway evrything is meant to be....me n pwb jus sacarstic frens, or mayb tts wat i feel dun get offended..tts wat we are....:)
hope is given up,
there are ppl who tried to lead,(i was der)
but failed.....
there are people who chose to follow......(now i am here)
its nt tt i wan to pull evrybody tgt, its just i dun wish to leave some ppl behind, can ur understand? Even though i know i can nv be a good fren to someone till he can sacrifice for me...lk smith took the mrt for lun.....but i appreciate for the little things ppl do for me...:)
nv tot i would come across political issues in jc....FUCK IT!!!!!
I just want to say wat i feel i m not makin a big fuss!!!!
17:13
; where did I go wrong?.
7.10.2006
Haiz it seems nio one in 12j bothered to reply me abt the comic strip....so sad:( HAIZ...nw i was once a best buddy to someone, now i am not....i feel left out no matter wer.....the 3, the 5 and me 1....try to figure it out urself wat i mean ba..........
sometimes its rlly so unfair.....smith n tpst quarrelled and had such a big fight, but now they are tokin tgt so happily and one of a grp...but i didnt have a quarrel with her or anything..ya i treated her coldly at a period of time....but i just want to be frens i tok to her no matter hw coldy she treat me i still took the initiative to talk to her....WAT HAVE I DONE WRONG?i nv get a reply when i tok to her, tts why even with the noodles i feel the same way as when i am with the 5....
Anyway i gues she jus wants for dunno wat reason jus dun wan treat me lk before.....noodles have its different kind of noodles and the 5 has their ppl...but i gues i m a little bit of some , i gues let's take things slowly....
Thx smith for asking me whether if i wanted to go pepper lunch, ur word made me feel 'an hui'...
even though i rlly wanted the treat!!! pan shuai mayb time is needed before we become lk before....i tot u spared a feeling when u tok abt the treat:) i gues u didn't.....so wateva la!!!!THx fren!
22:15
; where did I go wrong?.
7.09.2006
hey callin out to all 12j's send me ur pics leh...so i can draw ur mini comic version!!!i dun wan ur to think i am a pervert lookin at ur in class!!!send me ur best pic n i ensure i will draw the coolest little comical u!!!i will try my best....
summer test, it was a suicidal i didnt study...so tts all...regret is a too late kinda thing regret nt studying tts bullshit.....but i rlly wan to chg..i m gg to plan out my timetable by tml nit....i wan to promote to j2...I need tt someone in my life to change it!!!!where r u my 'special' one!!!!!!!!come to my asap can?these 2 days was all playing lan with lun sw tabs happy sung n cheng!!it was fun althoughi was lousy.....jus nw had dinner with tabs sw n lun n happy aft lan was the noisest dinner i had ever had with my 12j mates, it was enjoyable if all 12j outings evryone would speak more often and be freaking talkative lk me it would be FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tonit's topic is abt guys lk me.....
Guys can't understand gals, but alwas expect gals to understand them....and when gals treat us nice we r foolish enuff to think they like us..... i mean lk guys come on when a gal rlly likes u, she RLLY likes u......so pls dun think bcos a gal is close to u she likes u, tts B.U.ll.shit.....
anyway gals are also too profound fro guys sometimes, so pls enlighten us while u can...haha
tts all for my boring topic....
anyway, CALLING OUT TO ALL12j ppl if ur rlly send me photos i will draw ur comical self in 1 day time and post it in my blog the next day or the day aft the next day....serious!!!so send me send me NOW!!!
00:50
; where did I go wrong?.
7.04.2006
i actually wanted to draw a series of comic strips and post it on my blog....lol sry i din draw it out
i dun hav inspiration now leh....i alrdy hav the story line
so jus keep waiting, i will try to draw it out for all my readers to enjoy!!!!i tink mayb nxt wk i might post the pics of the characters...wat do ur wan leh ur wan cute type or cool type? pls tag my tagboard to ans my ques...thk u
18:57
; where did I go wrong?.
7.03.2006
blame on one for wat has happen,
cause the one to blame,
is no one but myself.
in a sad state indeed,
but pondering abt it time aft time,
it was all a costly mistake to make....
to make evrything my way,
is wat i have been desperately trying to do,
yet to only discover i was the selfish one,
my character is a burden i cannot let go,
but little by little i will learn to lighten it....
To let go is the solution to all my problems,
is something i learn from someone close to me....
i am grateful he was der at a time lk this,
surprisingly he was der jus when i needed him,
though he was nver the one expected to be my support.....
this is jus a part of life,
a journey of self dicovery.....
blaming others for bringing me sadness,
is a foolish act.....
i rlly put some thinking can evrything change? yes, it starts from me......for me....nt anyone esle
17:13
; where did I go wrong?.
7.01.2006
hey ya'll....dun ur tink evrything tt happens in ur life is fated to be? lk in my case i gues it was fated i was born to b lazy to study n it was fated i gt into innova jc, fated i got mr yeo as my form teacher, fated i gt frens who would alwas have problems with me but still be my fren n fated tt somethings which shuld get better got worse.........evrything is FATED TO BE!!!!!
i m rlly grateful to get a teacher lk mr yeo.....he is alwas der helping us along the way lk my grp's pw....its doesnt matter if my project is problematic or wat but it is the trust he gives us....he is putting his pride on the line for our project if my grp doesnt prove to other teacher tt my project CAN wrk out ...nt only our pride is lost but oso mr yeo. It has been 3 mths with mr yeo, i rlly appreciate having him as a teacher, he understands our difficulties as students as though he is a student nw and he look at things differently. The help he has given us n the money for our chalet, rlly made me feel so close to a teacher then any other teachers i had in the past 16 yrs.
And tt day i was rlly suprised tt day when zi jie ask me why our class was nt close to 'her' anymore.....i believe alot of ppl may noe who is tt her i am referring to. I was relieved to hear tt question as well, is lk the poeple u din expected to care actually care they actually care!! It rlly means there is alwas a hope a chanz tt evrything would get better......it seems my life journey of self discovery came late......it is rlly in ijc i get to see soo many things differently n experience so many different emotions. But its still weird sometimes our class dun tok much...so sometimes der is alwas this awkward silence which i rlly hate to have it.....
Anyway ytday me n qiu n sw n zi jie n shawn n tabby we had the most irritating n exciting food exploring adventure of our lives!!! we took 3 freaking hrs to finally settle down for food.....here it goes, i suggested pepper lunch at 1st but shawn had a budget so we went other places to find food. I was thinking since we came all the way to orchard, might as well eat some expensive food. So i told them to go jack's place so we walk along orchard to find jack's place but cannot fins so go find swenson's....in the end we found a swenson's outlet but it was crowded so we walk walk walk all the way frm cineleisure to Plaza Sing so this time we went swenson's to queue . I tot we finaaly could get to eat swenson's it was quiet a long wait, den qiu gt impatient n told the waiter we are in a rush which is a totally obvious lie...haha when we oni have to wait 7 mins more!!!!den so we went to mac den sddnly qiu siad lets go satay club....so we take mrt go der den so 'lucky' satay club was nt der anymore!!!!!!wah i was lk ba BOOM!!!! qiu ling sry hor i showed u attitude when u said srry to me....i was rlly pek cek liao la i tink evryone was jus tt i showed it more obvious, srry guys!!!finally we went to lau pat sa ate le n went home so tt was our amazing food race!!!!haha it was stupid n fustrating at the same time it was rlly a memory which we could laugh at...hehe
22:03
; where did I go wrong?.